你想他们有昨天的《每日新闻报》吗Do you think they have yesterday's Daily News?干吗Why?我只想看看我的星座占卜准不准I just wanna check my horoscope, see if it was right.天啊菲比别看你背后有个男的Oh,my God! Don't look now. Behind you there's a guy...完全有可能让咱俩心碎欲绝痛不欲生...who can break our hearts and plunge us into depression. 哪呢Where?到妈妈这来吧Come to mama.他来了冷静淡定淡定He's coming. Be cool. Be cool. Be cool.-帽子不错 -谢谢- Nice hat. - Thanks.咱们得做点什么吹口哨We should do something. Whistle.不能吹口哨I'm not whistling.-来吧吹吧 -不- Come on, do it! - No.吹吹吹Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it.我不敢相信你居然这么干了I can't believe you did that.我为什么要喊"呜哇哦"啊Why did I whoo- hoo?难道我期望他回过头来然后说Was I hoping he'd turn around and say... "我喜欢那声音我现在就要你" ..."I love that sound. I must have you now"? 我只希望我们能帮上一点忙I wish there was something we could do.你好Hello.你好昏迷的帅哥Hello, coma guy.起来你个美女杀手起来起来Get up, you Girl Scout! Up,up,up!菲比你在干什么Phoebe, what are you doing?也许没人试过这个方法Maybe nobody's tried this.希望至少能知道他的名字I wish we at least knew his name.瞧他这张脸Look at that face.即使他在昏迷中仍一副聪明样I mean, even sleeping, he looks smart.我猜他是个律师I doubt he is a lawyer.你看到他手指节上的茧子了吗Yeah, but did you see the dents in his knuckless?这意味着他是个艺术家That means he's artistic.他是律师但是兼职教雕塑Okay. He's a Lawyer who teaches sculpting on the side.而且他会跳舞And he can dance.他是那种静静听你讲话的人And he's the kind of guy who, when you're talking, he's listening... 而不会是那种嘴上说"我了解"... not saying, "I understand"...心里却猜想着你裸体的男人... but really wondering what you look like naked.我希望男生都像他这样I wish all guys could be like him.我知道I know.城里难道没有适合你们的清醒男生吗Are there no conscious men in the city for you two?他身旁没人照顾He doesn't have anyone.我们觉得应该负起责任Yeah, we-we feel kinda of responsible.我不敢相信你会喊出"呜哇哦"I can't believe you said"whoo-hoo."连我都不说"呜哇哦"I don't even say"whoo-hoo."哦她要出场了Oh, she's coming up. She's coming up!观众朋友们稍后Folks, when we come back我们将会讨论她的新书《往日谊情》we'll be talking about her new book, 'Euphoria Unbound': 以及永远都那么迷人的诺拉·泰勒·宾the always interesting Nora Tyler Bing.该让你的孩子上床睡觉了You might wanna put the kids to bed for this one咱们不用非得看这个Y'know, we don't have to watch this.Showtime HBO和Cinemax都Weekend At Bernie's is on正在播《老板度假去》呢Showtime, HBO, and Cinemax.没门省省吧No way, forget it.拜托她是你妈妈C'mon, she's your mom!没错《老板度假去》正上演Exactly. Weekend at Bernie 's尸体的腹股沟被打了二三十下哦Dead guy getting hit in the groin 20, 30 times. 钱德勒我得告诉你Chandler, I gotta tell you,我爱你妈妈写的书我很喜欢读I love your mom's books! I love her books!坐飞机的时候我必须看她的书I can't get on a plane without one.她的书简直棒极了I mean, this is so cool.是啊如果你在11岁大的时候Yeah, well, you wouldn't think it was cool你的朋友都竞相传阅if you're eleven years old《情妇婊子》79页时and all your friends are你就不会觉得棒了passing around page 79 of "Mistress Bitch".拜托钱德勒我喜欢你妈妈C'mon, Chandler, I love your mom.我觉得她不同凡响I think she's a blast.你这样说是因为她不是你妈You can say that because she's not your mom. 拜托她可是Oh, please. She's the-亲爱的 -晚上好- Hi, sweetie. - Bona sera那个意大利佬什么时候从罗马回来了When did "Rigatoni" get back from Rome?-昨晚 -真的- Last night. - Really?这么说他的飞机没在空中炸成火球So, his plane didn't explode in a big ball of fire? 只是我做过的一个梦Just a dream I had.但呼But, phew!她上场了Hey hey hey! She's on.诺拉·宾Nora Bing.再谈你的书吧Back to the book.你在伦敦被捕了What is this about you being arrested in London?到底是因为什么原因What is that all about?你妈被逮捕过Your mom was arrested?嘘我正感到无比的骄傲I'm busy beaming with pride.说来有点难为情This is kind of embarrassing...但是有时候在和男人亲热之后...but occasionally,after I've been intimate with a man... 她现在竟然会说难为情Why would she say that's embarrassing?我会非常想吃宫保鸡丁...I just get this craving for kung pao chicken.说得太详细了That's too much information.现在你正到处为新书做宣传Alright, so now you're doing this whole book tour thing,有什么计划吗how is that going?好吧明天我将Oh, fine. I'm leaving for前往纽约我不喜欢那里New York tomorrow, which I hate.不过我可以去看看我儿子我爱他But I get to see my son, who I love.我只能通过这种方式得知情况This is the way that I find out.大多数妈妈都会使用电话Most moms use the phone.请别误会Y'know, don't take this wrong,我一点没看出你已为人母I just don't see you as a mom somehow.. 我不是那个意思我没有恶意的I don't mean that, I don't mean that bad. 没事我是个很开明的妈妈Oh, no. I'm a fabulous mom.我儿子的第一个保险套都是我买给他的I bought my son his first condoms.然后他就欲火焚身了And then he burst into flames.议会正在讨论一项新的赤字削减法案Let's see. Congress is debating a new deficit- reduction bill. 市长打算再次提高地铁票价The mayor wants to raise subway fares again.今天最高气温45度The high today was 45.还有各种比赛正在进行And- oh, teams played sports.格伦怎么样了What about GIen?可以叫他格伦的He could be a GIen.不还不够特别Nah... not-not special enough.阿伽门农怎么样How about Agamemnon?太特别了Way too special.我饿死了我想吃什么呢I'm famished. What do I want?拜托别又是宫保鸡丁PIease, God, don't let it be kung pao chicken.你看节目了感觉如何You watched the show. What did you think?我觉得你应该更放开一些I think you need to come out of your shell. 这是什么小饭店What is this dive?只有你才会选这种地方Only you could've picked this place.拜托闭嘴这里很有趣Come on. Shut up. It's fun.来抱一个Give me a hug.我想我们可以喝点龙舌酒了Well, I think we're ready for some tequila. 我知道我该喝了I know I am.谁想来干一杯Who's doing shots?-我要 -我也是- Hit me. - I'm in.你呢罗斯There you go. Ross?我不是那种喜欢喝酒一口干的人I'm not really a shot-drinking kind of guy. 抱歉我们迟到了Hi! Sorry- sorry we're late,我们有点你懂的忘记时间了we, uh, kind of just, you know, lost track of time.但人是会变的But a man can change.有人想要我评价什么事情吗Anyone want me to appraise anything?宾太太我得告诉您Mrs. Bing, I have to tell you,你写的每本书我都看过I've read everything you've ever written.不我是说真的No, I mean it!我读《爽在午夜》时I mean, when I read Euphoria at Midnight,满脑子就当一个作家all I wanted to do was become a writer.别这么说我能办到的大家都能办到Oh, please, honey, listen, if I can do it, anybody can. 你只要从描写几个欧洲城市开始You just start with half a dozen European cities...以30个委婉语形容男性生殖器...throw in thirty euphemisms for male genitalia,这样嘭你的书写好了...and bam! You have got yourself a book.女士们先生们这就是我母亲My mother, ladies and gentlemen.226房有留言吗Yeah, any messages for room 226?-你还好吧猛男 -嗯我还好- You okay,slugger? - Oh,yeah. I'm fine.你今晚怎么了What is with you tonight?没什么我没事没事Nothing. Nothing, nothing.谢谢Okay,thank you.是因为那个意大利舔手男对吧It's the Italian hand-licker, isn't it?不是因为被他舔的那个人No. It's the one he's licking.她应该和你在一起She's supposed to be with you.你真行You're good.罗斯听我说Oh, Ross, listen to me.我的书通常都能卖出上百万本I have sold 100 million copies of my books,知道为什么吗and you know why?因为封面上的辣妹露两点The girl on the cover with her nipples showing? 不因为我知道如何描写No, because I know how to write men让女人芳心暗许的男人that women fall in love with.相信我保罗没有市场Believe me, I cannot sell a Paolo.人们不会愿意翻到第325页去看他People will not turn 325 pages for a Paolo.拜托那家伙只是个二流角色Come on. The guy's a secondary character.最终还是会被你打败的y'know, complication you eventually kill off.什么时候When?他不是英雄He's not a hero.知道我们的最佳男主角是谁You know who our hero is?封面上露两点的猛男The guy on the cover with his nipples showing?不是你No, it's you.-得了 -不我说真的- Please. - No ,really.拜托你那么聪明那么性感Come on. You' re smart. You' re sexy.-是嘛 -真的- Right. - Yes, you are.你会没事的相信我You are gonna be fine, believe me.我去街上尿吧I'll just pee in the street.钱德勒在吗Is Chandler here?-在啊 -过来- Yeah. - Come here.那个关于昨天晚上的事Okay, uh, about last night,钱德勒你没告诉他吧um, Chandler.. you didn't tell...好因为我想没必要告诉他Okay, 'cause I'm thinking- we don't need to tell Chandler, 只是个吻而已对吧I mean, it was just a kiss, right?吻一下没什么大不了的对吧One kiss? No big deal? Right?-是啊没什么大不了的 -好- Right. No big deal. - Okay.除非在疯狂世界中[漫画超人中的地方]In bizarro world.你坏了规矩了You broke the code.-什么规矩 -不能亲你朋友的妈妈- What code? - You don't kiss your friend's mom. 姐妹还可以漂亮的姑妈也行Sisters are okay. Maybe a hot- looking aunt.但是不可以是妈妈绝对不行But not a mom. Never a mom.你们在外面干什么What are you guys doing out here?乔伊和我正在讨论uh.. Well, Joey and I had discussed要早起去打壁球getting in an early morning racquetball game.但是很显然有人睡过头了But, um, apparently, somebody overslept.对啊你也没有带球拍Yeah, well, you don't have your racket.不我没带球拍拿去换线了No. No, I don't, because it's being restrung.有人应该帮我准备一个的Somebody was supposed to bring me one.是吗但你也没有告诉我你的手柄尺寸Yeah, well you didn't call and leave your grip size.好吧看来你俩耗在一起的时间太多了Okay, you guys spend waaaay too much time together. 好吧我是人渣我是人渣Okay, I'm scum, I'm scum.罗斯你怎么能干出这种事呢Ross, how could you let this happen?我也不知道天哪我I don't know, God, I...她不像是一般的妈妈你明白吗well, it's not like she's a regular mom, y'know?她她很性感She's, she's sexy.She's....你觉得我妈不性感吗You don't think my mom's sexy?不一样的性感Well, not in the same way.我得让你知道I'll have you know that Gloria Tribbiani葛罗瑞亚·崔比安尼当年也是美得不得了was a handsome woman in her day, alright?你觉得生七个孩子容易吗You think it's easy giving birth to seven children?好吧我觉得咱们越说越离谱了Okay, I think we're getting into a weird area here. 你们俩在外面干嘛呢What're you guys doing out here?反正不是打壁球Well, not playing raquetball.他忘了告诉我他的手柄尺寸了He forgot to leave his grip size.他也没有拿护目镜He didn't get the goggles.看来你们俩似乎有点猫腻啊Well, sounds like you two have issues.-再见宝贝 -再见甜心- Goodbye, baby. - Ciao, bela.他们是故意做给我看的吗Do they wait for me to do this?-你准备告诉他吗 -我干吗要告诉他- So are you gonna tell him? - Why would I tell him? 如果你不说他妈妈或许会说How about 'cause if you don't, his mother might.你俩干嘛呢What are you guys doing here?他连护裆都没有穿Uhhhh.... he's not even wearing a jockstrap.我刚问了什么What did I ask?你在这儿干什么What are you doing here?没事我只是顺路过来我从那个Nothing. I just thought I'd stop by, you know, after... 那个地方过来你知道的...that I, you know.那么你来这里干嘛呢So, what are you doing here?我不是专程来这里的I'm not really here.只是顺路拿这些过来顺路Just thought I'd drop these off on the way. My way. 你经常来吗Do you come here a lot...自己来...without me?不不不No, no, no.那么你觉得他现在比起早上来好点没有So, um, do you think he's doing any better than he was this morning? 我怎会知道我早上又没来How would I know? I wasn't here.真的吗也没替他换睡衣Really? Not even to change his pajamas?我的天Oh,my God.你是我朋友我得告诉你You're my friend. I had to tell you.我简直不敢相信I can't believe it.保罗亲了我妈妈Paolo kissed my mom?对不知道你注意到没有Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed,但他喝了很多酒but he had a lot to drink,而你知道他喝多了之后的德行and you know how he gets when he's drun...uh我办不到是我I can't do this. I did it.是我干的抱歉我亲了你妈It was me. I'm sorry. I kissed your mom.什么What?瑞秋和保罗的事令我很沮丧I was really upset about Rachel and Paolo,我想我是喝太多龙舌酒而诺拉and I think I had too much tequila, and Nora- um,妈妈太太你的宾又对我非常好Mrs. Mom- your Bing- was just being nice, y'know,不过什么事情都没有发生and- But nothing happened,什么都没有你问乔伊Nothing. Ask Joey.-乔伊进来了 -你知道这件事- Joey came in - You knew about this?你知道的知道这个概念很值得玩味的You know, knowledge is a tricky thing.我一整天都跟你在一起为啥不告诉我I spent the entire day with you, why didn't you tell me?! 喂喂他们被我逮到算你幸运Hey, hey, hey, you're lucky I caught them when I did,不然后果可不堪设想or else who knows what woulda happened.谢了老兄帮大忙了Thanks, man. Big help.真不敢相信你脑子里想什么呢I can't believe this! What the hell were you thinking?我没有我不是我I wasn't- I mean, I-你知道吗我所有的朋友中Y'know, of all my friends,没谁比你更了解我和我妈之间的纠结事no-one knows the crap I go through with my mom more than you. -我知道 -我无法相信你会做这种事- I know. - I can't believe you did this.我也是话说Me neither, y'know what-我还生气你没有告诉我呢I'm still mad at you for not telling me.你气我什么What are you mad at me for?你总得让我摔个门吧You gotta let me slam the door.钱德勒我又没亲她他亲的Chandler- I didn't kiss her, he did.-破坏规矩就是这种下场 -乔伊- See what happens when you break the code? - Joey-《被扒光的女人》瑞秋·凯伦·格林"A Woman Undone, by Rachel Karen Greene."对我想尝试一下Yeah. Thought I'd give it a shot.我还在写第一章I'm still on the first chapter.你认为他的"爱棒"从粗斜纹棉布料中Now, do you think his 'love stick释放了出来怎么样can be liberated from its denim prison'? 我想可以吧Yeah, I'd say so.另外饱满的满不是"慢"And there's no"J" in"engorged."嘿瑞秋Hey, Rach.-好啊 -好- Hello. - Hello.-今晚要去医院吗 -不你呢- Going to the hospital tonight? - No. You? 不你呢No. You?你刚问过了You just asked me.好吧也许这是一个有陷阱的问题Okay, maybe it was a trick question.瑞秋我们现在能开始了吗Rachel,can we do this now?好的我好兴奋Okay. I am so hot.这是一张我父母结婚时候的照片Now, here's a picture of my mother and father on their wedding day. 你能说我妈不迷人吗Now you tell me she's not a knockout.真不敢相信咱们会讨论这个问题I can't believe we're having this conversation.拜托只要想象她没有怀孕的样子就好C'mon! Just try to picture her not pregnant, that's all.中央公园很荣幸为各位介绍菲比·布菲小姐Central Perk is proud to present Miss Phoebe Buffay.谢谢嗯好吧Thanks, um, 'kay第一首歌是关于我最近刚认识的一个男人I'd like to start with a song that's about a man I recently met...那个人对我来说已经越来越重要了好...who's come to be very important to me. 'Kay.*你无须醒来当我的男人**You don't have to be awake to be my man**只要你还有一口气我就会握住你的手**As long as you have brainwaves I'll be there to hold your hand**虽然我们相遇不久**Though we just met the other day**不过我有些话要对你说**There's something I have got to say*谢谢各位我得稍微休息一下了Okay, thank you very much, I'm gonna take a short break.好吧感谢菲比小姐的演唱Okay, that was Phoebe Buffay, everybody. Woo!-她在搞什么 -菲比刚刚开始- What the hell was that? - Phoebe just started我是和乔伊讲话Yeah, I believe I was talking to Joey,明白吗亲妈妈的家伙alright there, Mother-Kisser?亲妈妈的家伙"Mother-kisser."我闭嘴就是了I'll shut up.钱德勒我能说几句话吗Chandler, can I just say something?我知道你仍在生我的气I-I know you're still mad at me,我只是想那晚一共就两个人对吧I just wanna say that there were two people there that night. Okay?两个嘴唇Two sets of lips.是哦她发生这种事情很正常Yes, well, I expect this from her. Okay?她一直是我的弗洛伊德梦魇She's always been a Freudian nightmare.好吧如果她经常做出这种事情Okay, well, if she always behaves like this,为什么你不说她呢why don't you say something?因为太复杂了这太麻烦了Because it's complicated, it's complex-喂亲我妈妈的人可是你啊Hey, you kissed my mom.我们正在排练希腊话剧We' re rehearsing a Greek play.真是有趣排练完没That's very funny. Are we done now?还没你不准备跟她谈谈No! Okay, you mean, you're not gonna talk to her, 你不准备告诉她你的感受吗you're not gonna tell her how you feel?不要That would be no.别以为你和我妈妈玩了湿吻Look, just because you played tonsil tennis with my mom... 就自以为了解她doesn't mean you know her. Alright?相信我跟她没法谈Trust me, you can't talk to her.是你不能还是你不敢Okay. "You can't"? Or you can't?好吧我的手指Okay, that's my finger.我的膝盖That's, that's my knee.还在排练Still doing the play.你把他怎么了Alright, whadyou do with him?-你醒了 -瞧瞧你- You're awake. - Look at you.感觉如何How, how do you feel?头有点晕基本上还行Uh, a little woozy, but basically okay.你的气色好极了Gosh, you look good.我感觉还行I feel good.你们是谁Who are you?-对不起 -我叫菲比·布菲- Sorry. - I'm Phoebe Buffay.我叫莫妮卡·盖勒我一直在照顾你I'm Monica Geller. I've been taking care of you. 我们都在照顾你We both have.这个雕刻画也是你们送的So, the Etch-a-Sketch is from you guys?实际上是我送的Well, actually it's just from me.我替你做脚底按摩I got you the foot massager.知道是谁帮你刮胡子的吗是我You know who shaved you? That was me-我念书给你听 -我唱过歌- I read to you. - I sang.谢了Well,thanks.-不客气 -没关系- Oh,my pleasure. - You' re welcome.我想那就再见了So I guess I'II see you around.什么就这样What? That's it?那就再见了"See you around"?-不然要我说什么 -我不知道- Well, what do you want me to say? - I don't know. 或许Maybe...该说"你们真好"..."That was nice.""我太感动了"" It meant something to me.""我会打电话给你的"" I'll call you."-好吧我会打的 -一点诚意都没有- Alright. I'll call you. - I don't think you mean that. 男生都这样This is so typical.我们付出付出You know, we give and we give...再付出...and we give.然后我们得不到任何回报And then- we just get nothing back!突然有一天And then one day, y'know,你醒了然后说"那就再见吧"it's just, you wake up, and "See you around!"走吧菲比Let's go, Phoebe.知道吗我们以为你与众不同You know what? We thought you were different. 但我猜那因为你在昏迷的缘故But I guess it was just the coma.车在楼下等着Car's waiting downstairs,我上来就是想I just wanted to drop off给你朋友送几本我的书these copies of my book for your friends.需要我在里斯本帮你买什么吗Anything you want from Lisbon?不需要知道你去哪就够了No, just knowing you're gonna be there is enough. 好吧要乖哦我爱你Alright, well, be good, I love you.你亲了我最好的罗斯You kissed my best Ross.好像说错了反正差不多Or something to that effect.好吧O-kay.我做了蠢事Look, it, it was stupid.-愚蠢至极 -愚蠢至极- Really stupid. - Really stupid.我也不知道是怎么发生的And I don't even know how it happened.抱歉孩子我保证不会再发生这种事I'm sorry, honey. I promise it will never happen again. -你感觉好点吗 -是的- Are we okay now? - Yeah.不不No. No...男人与门之间禁忌的爱Ah, the forbidden love of a man and his door..他做到了他跟她说了He did it. He told her off,不只是亲吻的事所有的事都说出来了and not just about the kiss, about everything.开什么玩笑You're kidding?他说你何时才能像个妈妈样子No, no. He said, "When are you gonna start being a mom?" 她回答说Then she came back with:你何时才能成长起来"The question is,when are you gonna realize意识到我也很性感I have a bomb?"等等你确定她不是说'Kay, wait a minute, are you sure she didn't say你何时才能成长起来意识到我是你妈"When are you gonna grow up and realize I am your mom?" -这样比较合理 -你也这样认为- That makes more sense. - You think?现在情况怎么样So, what's going on now?我不知道我一直在这儿说给你听I don't know. I've been standing here spelling it out for you. 我什么都听不到等等I don't hear anything. Wait, wait, wait.你看见什么了What do you see?很难说他们好小而且上下颠倒Hard to tell, they're so tiny and upside-down. 等等等等Wait,wait,wait.他们走过来他们走过去They're walking away. They're walking away. 不他们不走了No, no, they' re not.他们要过来了快逃They' re coming right at us. Run!-你还好吧孩子 -没事了- Are you okay, kiddo? - Yeah.很好好好的啊All right. You be good.小心开车Drive safe.-宾太太 -盖勒先生- Mrs. Bing. - Mr. Geller.你当真You mean that?对有何不可Yeah, why not?我告诉她了So I told her.-情况怎么样 -糟糕糟糕- How did it go? - Awful. Awful.没有比这更糟糕的啦Couldn't have gone worse.-感觉怎样 -不错- Well, how do you feel? - Pretty good.我告诉她了I told her.瞧看到没有Well, see?或许我亲你妈不是个馊主意So maybe it wasn't such a bad idea, y'know, me kissing your mom, uh? 我们不必继续往下说了But.. we don't have to go down that road.这只是第一章Okay. Now this is just the first chapter...我要大家坦白的意见...and I want your absolute honest opinion. Okay?在第二页中Oh, oh, and on page two,他的手没伸向她茁壮的双峰he's not 'reaching for her heaving beasts'.什么是"耐头"What's a "niffle"?通常在"茁壮的双峰"上可以找到You can usually find them on the heaving beasts. 好吧算我不会打字Alright, alright, so I'm not a great typist.等下你们看到那段Wait, did you get to the part about应为阴茎Penis他那巨大颤抖的"笔"了吗his 'huge throbbing pens'?当他用那东西写字的时候Oh, yeah, you don't wanna be around你不会想在场的when he starts writing with those.够了还我That's it. Give them back.。