How'd someone get a hold of your credit card number? 怎么会有人知道你的信用卡号码I have no idea. But Look how much they spent. 我也不知道你看他们花了多少钱Monica, would you calm down? 莫妮卡冷静点好吗The credit card people said that 信用卡部员说you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought. 你只须为你买的东西付款I know, it's just such reckless spending. 我知道只是他们花钱如流水I think when someone steals your credit card 我想那小偷偷去你的信用卡时...they've kind of already thrown caution to the wind. 早就忘了要小心谨慎吧Wow, what a geek. They spent $69. 95 on a Wonder Mop. 真是个呆瓜花了69.95元买"神奇拖把"That's me. 我买的Oh, yuck. Ross, he's doing it again. 讨厌罗斯他又这么干了Marcel, stop humping the lamp. 马塞尔别再侵犯那盏灯了Stop humping. Now, Marcel, come back, Come here, Marcel. 别蹭了停下马塞尔过来马塞尔Oh, no. Not in my room. I'll get him. 不别到我房里我去抓他出来Ross. You've got to do something about the humping. 罗斯你得想办法别让他发春了What? It's just a phase. 怎么了这只是暂时的Well, that's what we said about Joey. 我们当时也是这么说乔伊的Would you all relax? It's not that big a deal. 你们冷静点行吗这又没什么大不了- Marcel, stop it. Marcel. Bad monkey. - What? -马塞尔停坏猴子 -又怎么了Let's just say my Curious George doll is no longer curious. 只能说我的"好奇乔治"娃娃不再好奇了Monica, you are not still going over that thing. 莫妮卡你不是还在纠结吧- This woman's living my life. - What? -这女人过着我的生活 -什么She's living my life, and she's doing it better than me. 她过着我的生活而且过得比我好Look at this. Look. She buys tickets to plays I wanna see. 看她买的戏票是我一直想看的戏She, she buys clothes from stores 她买衣服的那家店that I'm intimidated by the sales people. 我一直被售货员冷眼相待She spent $300 on art supplies. 她花了300块买艺术用品You're not an artist. 你又不是艺术家I might be if I had the supplies. 要是有这些我或许已是艺术家了I mean, I could do all this stuff. Only I don't. 我本可以过这样的生活我却没有Oh, Monica, come on. You do cool things. 莫妮卡别泄气你活得很精彩Really? Let's compare, shall we? 真的吗那我们来比一比好吗Oh, it's so late for "shall we." 现在说"好吗"太晚了吧Do I horseback ride in the park? 我到过公园骑马吗- Do I take classes at the New School? - No. -我在新学校上过课吗 -没有This is so unfair! She's got everything I want, 太不公平了她拥有我想要的一切and she doesn't have my mother. 而且她没有我那样的妈How about Joey Paponi? 乔伊·帕波尼如何No, still too ethnic. 不好还是太民族了My agent thinks I should have a name that's more neutral..我的经纪人认为我该取个中立点的名字Joey Switzerland? 乔伊·瑞士如何Joey Switzerland? 瑞士是著名中立国Plus, you know, I think it should be Joe. 还有我觉得自己应该叫乔you know, Joey makes me sound like I'm this big 乔伊让我感觉...像个小不点you know, Joey makes me sound like I'm this big joey有小动物的意思which I'm not. 可我不是Joe, Joe, Joe Stalin? 乔乔乔·斯大林如何Stalin. Stalin. 斯大林斯大林Do I know that name? It sounds familiar. 我听过这名字吗听起来好熟悉Well, it does not ring a bell with me. 反正我没什么印象Joe Stalin. 乔·斯大林You know, that's pretty good. 这名字太霸气了You might wanna try Joseph. 或许你愿意叫约瑟夫Joseph Stalin. 约瑟夫·斯大林Joseph Stalin. 前苏联领导人- I think you'd remember that. - Yes. -这名字多好记 -没错Bye Bye Birdie, starring Joseph Stalin. 《再见小鸟》由约瑟夫·斯大林主演Joseph Stalin is the Fiddler on the Roof. 约瑟夫·斯大林参演《屋顶上的提琴手》Hi. Yes, this is Monica Geller. 嗨对我是莫妮卡·盖勒I believe I'm taking some classes with you, 我记得我有在你们那里上课and I was wondering what they were. 我想知道是哪些课- What are you doing? - All right, great. -你在干什么 -好的太棒了Great. Thanks a lot. I'm going to tap class. 太棒了非常感谢我要去上踢踏舞课What, what, so that you can dance with the woman 怎么你要和偷你信用卡的女人that stole your credit card? 一起跳踢踏吗This woman's got my life. 这女人偷走了我的生活I should get to see who she is. 我得看看她长啥样Go to the post office, I'm sure her picture's up. 去邮局看啊她的照片一定挂在墙上Okay, Monica, you know what, honey, you're kinda losing it here! 莫妮卡你知道吗你有点失控了I mean, this is really becoming like a weird obsession thing. 你现在执着得有点诡异了This is madness, it's madness, I tell you. 这是疯狂我跟你说这叫做疯狂For the love of God, Monica, don't do it. 上帝保佑莫妮卡别这么做Thank you. 谢谢- What do you think? - Lots of things. -你想什么呢 -百感交集- Which one do you think she is? - May I help you? -你认为哪个是她 -有什么能效劳的吗No, thanks. We're just here to observe. 不必了谢谢我们是来参观的You don't observe a dance class. You dance a dance class. 舞蹈课怎么能参观你们要来参与Spare shoes are over there. 那儿有没人穿的舞鞋What does she mean? 什么意思I think she means "You dance a dance class." 我想她是叫我们"参与到舞蹈课中"- Come on, come on, come on. - Really? -来吧来吧来吧 -真的吗Do you see anybody you think could be me? 有看见哪个人像我的分身吗Last time there were yogurt containers lying around after class. 各位上回有人在教室留下空酸奶瓶- Let's not have that happen again. - She could be you. -下不为例 -说不定是她Let's get started. 开始吧Five, six. Five, six, seven, eight. 五六五六七八- Okay, I'm not getting this. - I'm totally getting it. -我毫无头绪 -我完全融入Did you ever feel like sometimes 你可曾觉得you are just so unbelievably uncoordinated? 自己有时候毫无协调感What? You just click when they click. 怎么了他们踢你跟着踢就是了All right, people, now everyone grab a partner. 好了各位每个人找个舞伴All right. And my dead mother says you are it. I'm with Rachel. "我的亡母说就是你" 我跟瑞秋Great, it's gym class all over again. 这下好体育课的旧事又重演了Well that's all right, You can come up to the front and dance with me. 没关系你过来到前面和我一起跳Why don't I just take off my clothes and have a nightmare? 我何不脱下衣服来场恶梦It's okay, it's okay. I'm here, I'm here. 没关系没关系我来了I'm so sorry I'm late. 抱歉我迟到了Okay, here I am. So who's the new tense girl? 我来了这个紧张的新人是谁- She's your partner. - Hi, I'm Monica. -你的舞伴 -嗨我叫莫妮卡Oh, Monica. 莫妮卡啊Hi, I'm Mon 嗨我叫莫...- Nana. - Monana. -...娜娜 -莫娜娜- It's Dutch. - You're kidding. -是荷兰语 -你在开玩笑吧I spent three years in Amsterdam. 我在阿姆斯特丹住了三年Pennsylvania Dutch. 我是德裔宾夕法尼亚州人And we're dancing. Five, six, seven, eight. 开始吧五六七八Hi. 嗨- Hey. Where have you been? - I just got back from the vet. -你上哪儿去了 -我刚从兽医那回来She's not gonna make you wear a big plastic cone, is she? 她没叫你戴那种塑料大圆锥吧She says Marcel's humping thing is not a phase. 她说马塞尔发情不是暂时的Apparently, he's reached sexual maturity. 显然他已性成熟了Hey, he beat you. 哇比你早哎She says, as time goes on, 她说随着时间的推移he's gonna start getting agressive and violent. 他会越来越暴力侵略性越来越强So, what does this mean? 这代表什么I have to give him up. 我们不能再养他了I can't believe it, Ross. This sucks. 我真不敢相信罗斯这太扯了I don't get it, I mean, You just got him. 我不懂你也就刚养他How could he be an adult already? 他怎会突然成熟了I know. One day he's this little thing... 我知道他曾经就是个小不点and before you know it, he's this little thing I can't get off my leg. 不知不觉中这小不点抱住我大腿不撒手Isn't there any way to keep him? 你没什么办法继续养着他吗No. The vet said that unless he's in a place... 没有兽医说除非有个地方...where he has regular access... 让他能通过正常渠道...to some monkey loving... 发展一些猴类之爱... he's just gonna get vicious. 否则他会越来越残暴I just gotta get him into a zoo. 我得将他送到动物园- How do you get a monkey into a zoo? - I know that one. -如何把一只猴送进动物园 -我知道No, that's popes into a Vokswagen. 不那是如何让教皇进入大众汽车We're applying to a lot of them. 我们要多方申请Our first choice would be one of the bigger state zoos. 当然大型州立动物园是首选You know, like San Diego. Right? 比方说圣地亚哥动物园But that may just be a pipe dream. 那可能只是痴人说梦Because you know, he's out-of-state. 因为他都不在州内My vet knows someone at Miami, so that's a possibility. 兽医说她有迈阿密的朋友这是条路But that's two blocks from the beach. It's a total party zoo. 但那离海滩只有两个街区环境太嘈杂- We found her, We found the girl. - What? -我们找到她了找到偷卡女了 -什么Did you call the cops? 你们报警了吗No, we took her to lunch. 没我们和她一起吃了午餐Oh, your own brand of vigilante justice. 用你们的方式给她治了罪Are you insane? This woman stole from you. 你疯了那女人偷了你的东西She stole. She's a stealer. 她偷东西她是个小偷After you're with this woman for like 10 minutes, 和这女人相处十分钟后you forget all that. 你就会把这些全忘了I mean, she's this astounding person with this amazing spirit. 她真是个振奋人心的奇女子Yeah! Which she probably stole from some cheerleader. 是啊指不定从某位啦啦队员那偷来的- Take off their hats. - Popes in a Vokswagen. -脱下他们的帽子 -教皇塞进大众车- Take off their hats. - Popes in a Vokswagen. 笑话:教皇摘下高帽子才能坐进大众车I love that joke. 我喜欢这个笑话No way. No way did you do this. 不可能你绝不会这么做Monana was very brave. 莫娜娜相当勇敢It was so wild. We told them we were the Gundersons in room 615... 太疯狂了我们自称是615房的冈德森姐妹...only to find out the Boston Celtics had the entire six floor.结果波士顿凯尔特人队已包下整个六楼So once they caught on to the fact that we're, 当他们发现我们个子矮矮you know, short and have breasts... 还是女人的那一刻They threw us out. I was thrown out of a hotel. Me. 就把我们撵出来了我居然被撵出饭店哎Go, Monana. 干得好莫娜娜You ladies are not the only ones living the dream. 不光你们过着梦想中的生活I get to go pour coffee for people I don't know. Don't wait up. 我得去给陌生人倒咖啡了不用等我Oh, by the way... 对了...tomorrow we're auditioning for a Broadway show. 明天我们要去参加百老汇的面试- Excuse me? - There's an open call for Cats. -什么 -《猫》剧还有一个缺额I'm thinking we go down there, sing "Memories"... 我想我们可以去唱《回忆》I'm thinking we go down there, sing "Memories"... 剧中名曲...and make complete fools of ourselves. What do you say? 让自己大出洋相你意下如何No, no ,no. Remember who you're dealing with here. 不不不记住你在跟谁说话呢I mean, I'm not like you. 我不像你I can't even stand in front of a tap class. 我连站在踢踏舞教室前排都不敢That's probably because of your Amish background. 那可能是因为你的门诺教派背景- What? - You're Pennsylvania Dutch, right? -什么 -你不是德裔宾夕法尼亚州人吗Right. Till I bought a blow dryer. Then I was shunned. 对直到我买了吹风机就被驱逐了Right. Till I bought a blow dryer. Then I was shunned.门诺教派后人远离科技产品过着农业生活I used to be just like you. 我过去也和你一样And then, one day, I saw a movie that changed my life. 直到有一天我看了部改变我人生的电影Did you ever see Dead Poets Society? 你看过《死亡诗社》吗I thought that movie was so incredibly boring. 我认为这电影实在是太...无聊了I mean, that thing at the end where the kid kills himself 那孩子在电影的结尾自杀了because he can't be in the play? 只因他无法演出话剧What was that? It's like, 这是为了什么不就是"Kid, wait a year. Leave home, "孩子再忍一年离开家do some community theater." 到社区话剧团去"I walked out of there and I thought, 走出电影院时我想"Now that's two hours of my life that I'm never getting back.""花在这部烂片上的两个小时再也回不来了"And that thought scared me 这想法震惊了我more than all the other crap I was afraid to do. 从此便不再惧怕尝试任何事了Wow. Then I would definitely not recommend Mrs. Doubtfire.那我强烈建议你别看《窈窕奶爸》Wow. Then I would definitely not recommend Mrs. Doubtfire.与《死亡诗社》主演同为罗宾·威廉姆斯Oh, God. 上帝We didn't get into Scranton. 我们进不了斯克兰顿了That was, like, our safety zoo. 那是我们保底的动物园They take, like, dogs and cows. 他们连狗和牛都收See, I don't know who this is harder on, me or him. 我真不明白我和他谁更难受一点I'd say that chair's taking the brunt of it. 我想那椅子首当其冲Marcel. Marcel. Marcel, no. 马塞尔马塞尔马塞尔不要Good boy. See? How can nobody want him? 乖宝怎么会没人要他Somebody will. 一定会有人的You know, there already is a Joseph Stalin. 你知道吗早就有人叫乔瑟夫·斯大林了You're kidding. 开什么玩笑Apparently, he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered people.显然他是个嗜血如命的俄国独裁者You'd think you would've known that. 我还以为你考虑得挺周全呢You'd think I would've. 那是你想错了Phoebe. What do you think a good stage name for me would be? 菲比你认为我该取什么艺名登台Flame Boy. 火焰男孩Where exactly is your zoo? 你的动物园具体在哪Well, it's technically not a zoo, per se. 严格而言不算是个动物园It's more of an interactive wildlife experience. 更像是种互动式野外体验- Let me ask you some questions about, is it, uh, Marcel. - Yes. -我想请教你几个关于马塞尔的问题 -好Does he, uh, fight with other animals? 他会和其他动物打架吗No, no. He's very docile. 不会的他非常温驯Even if he were cornered? 就算被逼进角落也不会吗Well, I don't know. Why? 我不知道干嘛这么问How is he at handling small objects? 他掌控小东西的能力如何He can hold a banana, if that's what you mean. 他会拿香蕉如果你是这意思的话What about a hammer or a small blade? 锤子或小刀呢Why would he need a blade? 他为何需要小刀Well, if he's up against a jungle cat or an animal with horns,如果他要对抗的是狸猫或有角的动物...you got to give the little guy something. 你总得给这小家伙武器防身Otherwise, it's just cruel. 否则就太残忍了- He got into San Diego. - What? -他能去圣地亚哥了 -什么We came back from our walk. The phone was ringing.... 我们散步回来听见电话铃响He's in. 他被录取了Did you hear that, Marcel? San Diego. San Diego. 听见没马塞尔圣地亚哥要你了You're making a big mistake here. San Diego's all well and good... 你大错特错了圣地亚哥环境良好没错but if you give him to me, 但如果你把他交给我I'll start him off against a blind rabbit . 我能训练他对抗瞎眼的兔子...and give you 20% of the gate. 而且给你百分之二十门票收入Where the hell've you been? 你到底跑哪儿去了Monica and I just crashed an embassy party. 我和莫妮卡刚混进了大使馆的派对- Are you drunk? - No. -你喝醉了吗 -才没有呢- I'm lying. I am so drunk. - Oh, God. -骗你的我醉醺醺的 -天哪Right, Monica, you know what? You could've called. 莫妮卡你该打电话回来的I have been up here, I've been worried...Monica. 我一直在家里担心你莫妮卡Water rules. 好过瘾Yes. Yes, it does. 没错没错Okay, look, the restaurant called. 餐厅今天又来电话了They wanna know if you're gonna be showing up for work. 他们想知道你还要不要去上班Nope. Going to the Big Apple Circus today. 不我今天要去纽约马戏团Okay Monica, what are you doing? 莫妮卡你在干什么You're gonna lose your job. This is not you. 你会丢了工作的你不是这样的人No, it is me. 不这正是我I'm not just the person who needs to fluff the pillows... 我并不只是那种必须拍松枕头and pay the bills as soon as they come in! 帐单一来立刻去缴款的人You know, when I'm with her, I'm so much more than that. 和她在一起我就超越了那种人I'm Monana. 我是莫娜娜Hello? Yes, she is. Hold on a second please. 喂对她在等等Monana, it's for you. The credit card people. 莫娜娜你的电话信用卡公司打来的Hello. 你好Yes? 是吗Oh, my God. 天呐- Thanks. - What? -谢谢 -怎么啦They've arrested Monica. 他们逮到莫妮卡了How are you? 你好吗Not too bad. Fortunately, blue's my color. 不太糟幸好我喜欢蓝色How did you know I was here? 你怎会知道我在这儿Because I'm Monica Geller. 因为我是莫妮卡·盖勒It was my credit card you were using. 你用的是我的信用卡That I was not expecting. 真是没想到I want you to know, it wasn't me who turned you in. 我想让你知道去报案的人不是我- Thanks. - No, thank you. -谢谢你 -不我要谢谢你You have given me so much. 你教会我太多东西if it wasn't for you, I would never have gotten to sing 如果不是你我永远不可能...... "Memories" on the stage at the Winter Garden Theater. 在冬园剧院的舞台上演唱《回忆》Well, actually, you only got to sing "Memo" 老实说你只开口唱了"回"而已I can't believe you're here. What am I gonna do without you? 我不敢相信你会在这失去你我该怎么办Who's gonna crash the embassy parties with me? 谁陪我混进大使馆的派对Who's gonna take me to the Big Apple Circus? 谁带我去纽约马戏团Monica, I started my day by 莫妮卡我开始新一天的方式peeing in front of 25 other women... 是在25个女人面前尿尿...and you're worried about who'll take you to the Big Apple circus?你却担心没人带你去看纽约马戏团演出Well, not worried, you know, just wondering. 不是担心只是迷惑There's nothing to wonder about, Monica. 没什么好迷惑的莫妮卡You're gonna go back to being exactly who you were, 你继续做你自己because that's who you are. 因为那才是真正的你- Not necessarily. - Yes, necessarily. -没必要吧 -很有必要I don't know what it is. Maybe it's the Amish thing. 我不知道为什么或许因为你是门诺教徒I'm not actually Amish. 我其实不是门诺教徒Really? Then why are you like that? 真的吗那为何你那么怪- You, by the door, in or out? - ln. -门旁边那个加不加入 -加入You in the back. You're getting it all wrong. 后面的你完全跳错了But at least I'm doing it. 至少我在跳This is the final boarding call for Flight 67... 这是飞往圣地亚哥67次航班的最后登机通知... to San Diego boarding at gate 42A. 登机口在42AOkay, goodbye, little monkey guy. All right, I wrote you this poem. 再见小猴子这是我给你写的诗Okay, but don't eat it till you get on the plane. 上飞机后才能吃Thank you, Aunt Phoebe. 谢谢你菲比阿姨Okay, bye, champ. 再见了棒小伙子Now, I know there's gonna be a lot of babes in San Diego, 我知道圣地亚哥那儿美女如云... but remember, there's also a lot to learn. 但记得要学习的还很多I don't know what to say, Ross. It's a monkey. 我不知该说什么罗斯他是只猴子Just say what you feel, Joey. 说出你的感觉就成了乔伊- Marcel, I'm hungry. - That was good. -马塞尔我饿了 -这句不错Marcel, this is for you. 马塞尔这是给你的It's just, you know, something... 你懂的留给你在...to do on the plane. 飞机上无聊时玩If you don't mind, I'd like to take a moment, just me and him. 如果不介意的话我想和他独处一会儿- Oh, sure. Absolutely. - Go ahead. -当然可以 -去吧Marcel, come here. Come here. Come here. 马塞尔过来过来过来Well, buddy... 小家伙...this is it. 就这样了Just a couple of things I wanted to say. 我只想说几句话I'm really gonna miss you. 我会想你的You know, I'm never gonna forget about you. 我永远不会忘记你的You've been more than just a pet to me. 在我心中你不只是一只宠物You've been more like a... Okay. Marcel. 你更是...马塞尔Would you leave my leg alone? 能放开我的腿吗Would you just stop humping me for two seconds? 就不能有一秒钟别乱来吗Marcel! Okay, would you just take him away? Just take him. 马塞尔...带他走好吗带他走吧Oh, that I were a glove upon that hand... 希望我是你手上的手套...that I might touch thy cheek. 这样我就能抚摸你的脸颊- That's fine. Thank you. - Next. -好了谢谢 -下一位I'll be reading for the role of Mercutio. 我来试演"马丘修"角色的- Name? - Holden McGroin. -名字 -侯登·麦克葛罗尼- Name? - Holden McGroin. 谐音holding my groin:握住我那里第一季第二十一集老友记So no one told you life was gonna be this way 没人告诉你生活会是这样your jobs a joke, you're broke, 你滑稽的工作你的差劲your love life's D.O.A. 你半途而废的爱情It's like you're always stuck in second gear, 就像开车卡在二档And it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, 每日每周每月or even your year, but 甚至每年都是如此I'll be there for you, 大雨倾盆时when the rain starts to pour. 我会陪伴你I'll be there for you, 我会陪伴你like I've been there before. 像我以前那样I'll be there for you, 我会陪伴你'cause you're there for me too. 因为你也陪伴着我。