第一幕四大才子出场人物：唐伯虎，祝枝山，文征明，周文斌，如花，群众群众：Look the "Four Scholars" are over there.Go and have a look hurry up.你们看你们看,江南四大才子在那边真的耶,江南四大才子耶…唐：You can never escape.别走…别走····想跑?你飞不出我的五指山的祝枝山：Brother Pak Fu it's crowded.We come here for a tour,that's why the women are that crazy.伯虎兄,很多人在看呢今天我们江南四大才子到这里游山玩水难怪那些女子疯狂了周：That's why!说的是啊文：Why not a poem competition?各位各位,既然今天大家兴致这么好,不如吟诗如何?祝：Very good!Why don't you start first? Brother Man bun.征明兄提议的好文斌兄你先来周：I am strong in this field."There are many geese under the mountain".来呀山下一群鹅文："They rushed down to the river".嘘一声赶落河祝："Let's roast a goose".落河捉鹅医肚饿唐："After roasting you'd better go home for a screw".吃完回家玩老婆一起：Good very good.Very good.对得妙呀祝，周，文：Isn't it that funny?真的那么好笑吗文：I wonder why is he always so happy when he is in a trip?为什么唐兄每次出游,都那么豪情奔放呢周：I envy him so much.乐极忘形,实在令人羡慕羡慕呀祝：He is so good in making poems.And he is an excellent artist.不过老实说,在江南论文章,唐兄他才高八斗论丹青,妙笔生花真是不折不扣的才子啊周;He is really great! But he is good in playing music too.不错,更令人的羡慕的就是他在音律方面也有很高的造诣唐：Right I know playing all kinds of music instruments. I have studied a new kind of music, it's great, let's play it together if we've a chance.那倒是,古今中外各种乐器,我样样都玩的出神入化最近我还在研究一种西洋打击乐器,很带劲儿啊有机会可以研究一下周：I love it.研究一下文：But I envy you because of your wives. All your wives are pretty. I don't think you will have any regrets in your life. I envy you so much. Bravo.我觉得唐兄最令人羡慕之处莫过于他的艳福人人都知道唐兄家中有八位夫人个个貌美如花,国色天香做人能像唐兄这样,夫复何求啊羡煞死人了是不是呀祝：There is something attractive. See there is a beauty. She seems to be lonely. Why not show us how to court a girt for us. To let us learn!有马子可以上呀唐兄,你看桥头有个婀娜多姿的美女,孤孤单单的这样好了,你就当场示范一下你的泡妞大法让我们兄弟几个好好的学一学唐：Well.、、、这个嘛…周：It's the welfare for your friends so?事关大家的福利,你没问题吧唐：I am glad to demonstrate it.义不容辞文:Go.去呀唐：Miss.小姐如花：What's the matter?公子何事?祝。

周、文：Go go.上,上唐：May I put my head on your shoulder?没什么,我想借小姐的肩膀搭一下,不知道可不可以如花：No I am a girl a decent girl.这怎么行,我可是黄花大闺女唐：I know I want to make my friends happy that's all.I am Tong Pak Fu.我知道,我只不过想整整我的朋友而己其实在下正是唐伯虎如花：So what? I don't know you. I will shout for help if you don't leave me alone.什么糖做的老虎?我不认识你你再不走我可要叫了唐：How about paying you 1 tael?这样好了,我给你一两银子意思意思如花：Who do you think I am? Make it ten.一两银子?你当我什么? 最起码十两唐：That's too expensive why don't you rob?你这德行还要十两,干脆去抢了如花：Right I am robber. Give me all your money.不错,我就是抢把钱拿出来唐;Go to hell.你…你…去死如花：Go to hell.打你捅你祝：What's wrong?搞什么鬼? 怎么啦文：Don't you want to make a serious punch like this?你出手也太重了吧唐：Robber! It's a ladyboy!他想抢钱呀,这个死人妖祝：Ladyboy? I love it. Hold it.人妖我喜欢,拿着文：He is faster than me! Damn it.真可惜,被他抢先一步第二幕卖身进华府人物：唐伯虎、卖身甲男、秋香、石榴、唐伯虎的假爹唐：You can't move! Got me? 戏要上演了,等一下打死你都不能动哦爹：Don't cheat me,you should pay me! 你说卖的所有钱都给我,不许赖皮哦唐：How can I cheat a wise guy like you? 以你的智慧,唬得了你吗?爹：That's right. 那倒也是唐：Cheap man!A brand new cheap man for e and have a look!I'm so poor! 街坊邻居快来呀,刚出炉的孝子大拍卖不买也来看看呀我很惨呀石榴：Are you selling yourself to bury your dad?But it's not lucky to seea dead body early in the morning. 这位小哥,你大清早在这里卖身葬父太不吉利了吧唐：I don't wish to give you bad feeling. 我也不想啊秋香：You look familiar,where did I see you? 我们好像在哪儿见过吧?你看起来好面善啊石榴：Really? 是吗?唐：It doesn't matter let's make friends now.Why don't you be merciful buy me please. 所谓相逢何必曾相识求求两位姐姐可怜可怜我吧石榴：What a pity we need a workman,why not.·····真是好惨呀,我们正好缺个下人,我看就甲：I am poor I want to sell myself to bury my whole family! 我好惨呀,卖身葬全家唐：Kidding?! 不会吧甲：Be merciful, my family died last night.I am sick why not buy me?May be I'll cut half price! 两位姑娘,可怜可怜我吧,我一家六口一晚全死光了我身染十级肺痨,半卖半送,你就买了我吧秋香：He is poorer,why not buy him to be our workman? 石榴,你看他可怜多了,我们就把他买回华府好不好石榴：So buy him. 那就买他吧唐：Lady first come first serve I come first. 姐姐,我先来的耶秋香：It's not a problem of priority. 这不是先后的问题石榴：He has to bury six and you have to bury one only.I do want to help you but,it's difficult for me to buy two. 对呀,人家家里死了六个,你家才死了一个我也很想帮你,但是我真的很为难呀唐：But I am poor too. 可是我也很惨呀石榴：Show me how poor you are. 你有什么比他更惨的快说出来呀唐：Well I.See how dirty are my fingernails?It's too pity right? 我…这…你看我这几在没有剪指甲,里面全是黑泥难道这还不够惨吗?甲：Wong Choi don't die! Don't die.You have followed me for a long time,you're so good to me. But I have never given you sufficient food.I am damn sorry. 旺财…旺财,你不能死呀,旺财…你跟了我这么久,对我有情有义,肝胆相照可是到现在我连餐饱饭都没让你吃过我对不起你呀,旺财唐：Watch out.Siu Keung how are you?Don't die Siu Keung don't die.We have suffered for such a long time,I take you as my relative.How can you leave me like this. 小心呀小强,小强你怎么了小强?小强,你不能死呀我跟你相依为命,同甘共苦这么多年一直把你当成亲生骨肉一样教你养你想不到今天白发人送黑发人石榴：Sister Chou heung they are poor what'll we do? 秋香姐,他们两个都这么惨,怎么办?秋香：Let's wait and see. 看看再说甲：Damn!Brother wait.Look at you you look rich,why not go home and make up first?Look at me I am thin,and see the abscess on my hands!I am poorer. 妈的大哥,你别闹了你看看你那么干净,进去化个妆再来吧你看看我,烂命一条,满手烂疮你怎么惨得过我?唐：Pal don't challenge me. 你不要跟我比,我最受不了人家跟我比了甲：So what? 跟你比又怎么样?唐：Are you pushing me? 你这是在逼我嘛甲：I am poorer so what? 你能比我惨嘛唐：Go to hell!See my whole hand is cut off.Who is poorer now? 他妈的你说你满手烂疮,现在我整条手都断了谁比谁惨呀甲：Don't go too far! 你玩的太绝了吧唐：It's show hand so what? 你老子我今天跟你卯上了甲：I'll play with you.OK I will show hand too.Are you playing tricks with me?I don't want my life either,see how can you compete with me.Who is poorer? 老子陪你玩到底他妈的,来呀想跟我玩我连命都不要了,看你还怎么跟我比?谁敢比我惨呀?唐：Bravo! You are really great. 好小子,算你惨,我们后会有期了石榴：Hey he is dead I can buy you now. 那个人死了,只有买你了唐：Really? 是吗?石榴：Right. 是呀唐：5 taels more please. 那个你再加五两石榴：How can you raise your price suddenly? 你这是坐地起价唐：I want to bury him too. 不是,我是想把这位老兄埋了石榴：You are so kind let's buy him. 真是个好人,就买他吧秋香：Shek lau we have to ask the permission of Madam e again early tomorrow morning. 石榴,你说买就买呀?我们得先进去问问夫人才能决定啊你明天再来好了石榴：I am going to ask Madam now. 我去问唐：Thank you Miss Chou heung.Such a seducing smile!Mom I have got it. 秋香姐,辛苦你了现在就开始挑逗我老娘,我得手了。