破产姐妹第一季第一集Pick up! Tables 12, 4, 11.十二四十一号桌上菜Got it.来了Hey, when you get a second,等你丫有空...stop looking at my boobs.麻烦把淫眼从我奶上移开Excuse me.麻烦一下Waitress?服务生Dude?小二Hi, what can I get ya?您好请问要点什么We need some...我们要...Is that annoying?看了会不爽吗Is that obnoxious and rude?觉得对方又欠扁又无礼吗Would you find it distracting if someone did that to you 你工作时有人这么弄你while you were working?你会觉得烦吗Oh, you don't have a job. Sorry.哎呀忘记你没工作了抱歉Damn, dude, she burned you.靠伙计她完胜呀No, hipster.别搞错了小痞子Do not think we're on the same team.别以为我跟你是一国的We have nothing in common.咱俩到死都不是同路人I wear knit hats when it's cold out.姐戴帽子挡酷寒You wear knit hats cause of Coldplay.二货戴帽学酷玩[乐队]You have tattoos to piss off your dad.你的纹身是想气死你爹My dad doesn't know he's my dad.我爹压根不知他是我爹And finally,最后you think...你觉得this is the sound that gets you service.一声穿云指我千军万马来服务I think...要我说This is the sound that dries up my vagina.一声穿云指我如瀑下阴也干枯The other waitress disappeared, the Russian one. 那位俄国服务生呢怎么不见了We need horseradish.我们想要山葵酱Please.拜托您了That, ladies, is how you treat a waitress.妹妹真乖这样才有礼貌嘛Paulina!宝莲娜Oh, so... so good, oh...爽爽死了Oh, sorry, I didn't realize you were on break.抱歉不知道你在休息I just need some horseradish.我要山葵酱- Here. - Oh, cool.-给-收到Excuse me, where's my waitress?请问服务生去哪了She's coming.她马上来[高潮]Earl.厄尔Earl!厄尔I made your favorite, red velvet.我做了你最爱的红丝绒蛋糕My little cupcake brought me a cupcake.我的蛋蛋妹给我带来了小蛋糕Let me pay you for that.我还是把钱给你吧Oh, no, no. It's on the house.不用我请客It's your birthday.你生日嘛How old are you gonna be?过完生日要几岁了啊75.七十五岁Oh, Earl, if you were just three years younger.厄尔你要小个三岁咱俩就成了Max, Max, big news.麦克斯麦克斯大新闻The new boss fired that Russian waitress, Paulina.新老板炒了俄国妞宝莲娜Turns out chesty Kournikova was Vladimir Puttin' it out. 大胸金丝猫被发现其实是个死间谍Hello today. I have paycheck for you.早安我带了你的工资来I need to talk to you. You fired Paulina, Han?我有话问你你炒了宝莲娜吗阿憨I am no longer Han Lee.我已经不叫李憨了I have new American name我取了新的英文名字to go with changing neighborhood.好适应新时代"得"社会To go with the changing neighborhood.是新时代"的"社会You need to remember this for your immigration exam. 移民考试的时候别又说错了Correct. To go with the changing neighborhood.行好适应新时代"的"社会Bryce?小笼Your name is Bryce Lee?你改名叫李小笼啊Wait, wait, um, um, um...等等等一下Don't hire a new waitress, okay?别再招新人来了好吗I've been doing all the work anyway,反正活儿总是我全包and I really could use the extra money.让我多拿一份工资补贴家计吧You need help.你需要帮手- No, I don't. - Everyone need help sometimes.-不用-谁都需要帮手I don't. I've been waiting my whole life, okay?我不用我当了一辈子的侍应I've waited on tables, I've waited in bars,在餐厅酒吧都做过侍应I've waited on home pregnancy tests.甚至在家等验孕结果[Waited: 等待侍应一词多义]I already hire new waitress.我已经雇新人了She work in all top restaurants in Manhattan.她以前在曼哈顿顶级餐厅工作过I gave her Paulina's uniform.我都把宝莲娜的制服给她了Mr. Lee, not to complain,李先生有点事情想问问but I think someone wore this uniform before me,这件制服好像有人穿过了呢like right before me.而且是刚刚才穿过Is it possible that I could get another one?可不可以帮我换一件全新的呀Maybe one that's a little less moist.换件没这么湿漉漉的Also this mustard color doesn't really go with my skin tone, 另外我的肤色跟黄芥末色不太搭neither do the mustard stains...跟芥末渍也不搭And these various other stains, and smells.跟这各式污渍异味更是不搭I hope that's clam chowder.白白的是蛤蜊浓汤渍吧...So...所以I think it'd be better for everyone,为了大家including my immune system,以及我的免疫系统着想if I just keep on wearing what I'm wearing,我就穿自己这身就好了and not the apron,'cause this is chanel.那件就省了我这身可是香奈儿So thank you,感谢聆听and let's waitress.本小姐要上岗啦Whatever that is,这娇娇女明显就是it does not belong in this diner.来错地方打错工了It belongs in a show on Bravo.她应该去演电视But she blonde, hair so shiny,她是金发妞金发闪闪good for business.有助财源广进啊Where do you even find these people?你都去哪找到这些歪瓜裂枣的啊The Russian hooker, the one before that was a meth addict. 俄罗斯妓女再前一位还是吸毒妹You train her, I am boss.你去训练她我可是老板Da boss.老板中的老板Fine, but make her wear the uniform.好那你先去命令她穿上制服Are you sure we can't get the meth addict back?真不能让吸毒的回来吗She was really good at cleaning.她是毁尸灭迹打扫神人呢But her teeth fall out.可她吸毒到牙掉光了You are really judgmental, you know that?你也太以貌取人了吧I'm only gonna say this once, so pay attention.我就说一回仔细听I'm Caroline, by the way. And you're Max?我是卡洛琳你叫麦克斯对吗Don't get attached.先别建立感情This is the Williamsburg diner, owned by Han Lee,这间威廉伯格餐厅老板是李憨Who just changed his name to Bryce Lee,最近刚改名叫李小笼because I guess he wants people to take him even less seriously. 他应该是患了不被当笑话会死的病Eight months ago he bought it from the Russian mob.八个月前他向俄国黑帮顶下这餐厅Clientele used to be all eastern bloc criminals and crack whores, 以前客源通常是东欧小流氓吸毒妓女but then he took it over and ruined it.他顶过来之后客源就跑光了Hey, sexy woman.哟性感辣妹You look so pretty today.今儿个性感动人啊You look so beautiful, I forgot how bad your personality is.美得我差点忘了你是悍妇了Thanks, Oleg.承蒙夸奖奥列格Hey, Barbie.嗨芭比小妞That's Oleg.他是奥列格He will hit on you aggressively and relentlessly.他将会不停地用烂招泡你He doesn't realize he looks like that,他的自信多到爆棚and I don't have the heart to tell him.可惜我没多余的善心点醒他Miss, could we have some menus?小姐可以给份菜单吗Oh, sure.当然Don't smile.不要微笑Cause it raises the bar, and then I have to smile,你拉高服务标准我就得跟上and I can't be doing that.那样太累人了It's exhausting and I have a bad back.微笑又累人又有害健康That's Earl, we're in love.那是我的恋人厄尔Do not talk to him,别跟他多讲话unless you want to feel whiter than you already are. 除非你想显得更"白"痴Oh, and that stain?还有那块污渍Not clam chowder.其实是男人"精"华Go marry the ketchups.去把番茄酱连一起Marry the ketchups. I'm on it."联姻"起马上好Okay. Now divorce the ketchups."联姻"完弄离婚吧Stop! Stop! Stop!停停停There's no such thing as divorcing the ketchups.让番茄酱离婚纯属我鬼扯You've never waitressed a day in your life.你压根就没当过服务生对吧Yes, I have.我真的做过You expect me to believe you看完你这出after watching that whole Temple Grandin routine? 奇葩的演出后鬼才信你- I'm telling Lee. - Okay, okay,-我去跟老板检举你-别求你了I may have enhanced my resume.我的确稍微美化了我的简历Enhanced? What, are we in Paris?美化你当参加巴黎时尚展啊Please, I really need this job, okay?求你了我真的很需要这份工We lost all of our money.我们家一无所有了My trust fund was taken for legal fees.我的信托基金被拿去支付律师费My dad is in jail.老爸又入狱了What? What are you, Martin Channing's daughter?干嘛难不成你是马丁·钱宁的女儿啊Where's the paper?报纸在哪Martin Channing?马丁·钱宁The guy who ripped off the entire city is your father. 骗光整座城的人是你老爸He told us we were having a good year.他只跟我们说今年生意挺好You're Caroline Channing.你是卡洛琳·钱宁You're like a billionaire.你可是亿万富翁Was. Was a billionaire.曾是曾是亿万富翁They froze all our assets, everything's gone.所有资产都被冻结了全没了I only have what I could grab,我只能拿几样东西走and I grabbed all the wrong things.可我全拿了没用的东西- So do you know the president? - I've met him.-你认识总统吧-见过- He's hot. - He's the president.-他很性感吧-他就是个总统- Have you been to Switzerland? - Yes.-你去过瑞士吧-去过- Do you have a horse? - Yes.-你有马吗-有- Do you know Paris Hilton? - No, she's a hundred. -认识帕丽斯·希尔顿吗-不认识她太老了Excuse me, uh, two hot chocolate, please.麻烦一下两杯热巧克力Comin' up.马上好Let me do that, please.让我来吧I'm a really fast learner.我学东西可快了I went to Wharton business school.沃顿商学院毕业I got 2,300 on my SAT.SAT考了两千三百分Can you make a hot chocolate, or not?那你做得出热巧克力吗Nailed it.搞定We split the tips. Give me yours.小费均分把你的拿来You did better than I thought you would.比我预计的好多了Listen, tonight I thought of a way我刚想到了一个we could make some extra money.赚外快的办法They've totally underestimated the price那些红丝绒蛋糕point on those red velvet cupcakes.定价实在低的离谱In Manhattan the asking price is at least seven,在曼哈顿这至少卖七块so we could sell them for seven, and then pocket the difference. 我们就卖七块赚价差中饱私囊Nothing about that sounds wrong to you?难道你不觉得有什么不对吗It's not our fault that the idiot who makes the cupcakes做蛋糕的傻子定价这么低doesn't know their worth.又不是我们的错I'm the idiot who makes the cupcakes.我就是做蛋糕的那傻子New information.我才知道嘛That's stupid.这肯定不行No one would pay $7 for one of my cupcakes.谁会花七块买我的蛋糕啊Really? 'Cause...你确定吗看这...Well, at least we know you're not adopted.果然有遗传你爸弄钱的基因啊So how'd you even end up in Brooklyn?你怎么会沦落到来布鲁克林打工Oh, I went on .我去招工网站Typed in "place where nobody输入上东区的人[富人区]from the Upper East Side would ever go, ever,"这辈子绝对不会去的地方and this diner came up.就出现这家店了You can't wear a fancy leather jacket outside这里治安差穿高级皮衣in this neighborhood.铁定会被抢You have to turn it inside out.反着穿露出丑的那面Fur. Cool. Turn it back.皮草算了再翻回来吧So where do you live?你住哪儿呀Our townhouse was taken and bolted up by the bank, so... 我家大宅被银行没收查封了Is this where I'm supposed to feel sorry for you?我需要表达一下同情吗I mean, I don't want you to,我是不想逼你啦but just so you know, a well-adjusted person would.不过正常的好人都会同情的I'm dead inside.我是没同情心的坏人You make that pretty obvious.是人都看得出来Anyway, I'm just gonna stay in the city with a friend.好吧我要去市中心的朋友家了I live a couple of blocks that way.我就住附近I'd walk you to the subway,我照理该陪你走去地铁站的it's just that I don't want to.不过我真的没这么好心Got it.完全理解Okay.就这样吧Robbie!罗比Why is the music so loud?放这么大声干嘛呢It's 3:00 in the morning.现在都凌晨三点了I'm sorry.对不起嘛It's cool. So what are you doin'?原谅你吧你们在干嘛呢The band's practicing.乐队在练习呢But you're not playing any instruments.怎么没看到乐器呢Yeah, that's how we practice.这是我们独门秘技We, like, listen to other good music,听着别人的音乐and play it in our head.然后在自己脑海演练It's like the secret.这好比不能弹的秘密Well, I have a secret for you guys.是吗我也有个秘密要跟你们说Get out!给我滚出去- Uh, you guys better go. - We should go.-伙计们先走吧-好的Sorry guys, I still have to make the cupcakes.抱歉了我还得做小蛋糕呢Cupcakes? For why? You can just buy 'em at the store. 干嘛自己做去店里买一个不就得了You can do that in the morning, babe, come to bed. 起来再做吧宝贝现在是滚床单时间No, I can't. I have to be in the city by 10:00.不行我明早十点要到市中心Fine. You can have three minutes.好吧给你三分钟Fine, you can have eight, one for each ab.好吧看在八块腹肌的份上给你八分钟Stand clear of the closing doors.关门请注意Well, I can cross that off my bucket list.太好了死前心愿又完成了一样I have a taser!我有电击棒Oh, my God.天啊I am so sorry.真是万分抱歉I didn't think it would hurt so much. It's pink.我以为这只是粉红小电棒It didn't feel pink.我都要被电成炭粉了I didn't know it was you.我刚真不知道是你I thought I was being raped.我还以为自己被人强奸了呢That's not what rape feels like.摸你的手算个屁强奸啊Did you... did you sleep on the subway?昨晚...你是在地铁上睡的吗I had nowhere else to go,我没地可去and I'm too afraid to sleep outside on the street.又不敢睡大街上God, you're spoiled.天啊还真是娇生惯养Next stop, Greenpoint.下一站格林中心Ugh, get your stuff, come on!快拿好你的行李I'll take you to my place, but hurry.我带你去我家吧快点Cause I have to be in the city in 30 minutes.我要三十分钟内赶回市中心Call me.要打给我哦Oh, my god, you've been robbed!天啊你家进贼啦This is how it always looks.我家本来就这样Oh, my God, totally cute!天啊你家真不错All right, I'll be back at 4:00,好了我四点回来and we can go to work together.然后我们一起上班Bathroom, bedroom,卫生间卧室boyfriend sleeps till 4:00, yard.睡到四点才醒的男友院子Oh, you have a yard.你还有个院子Looks like a really nice place to relax and do crack.感觉是放松吸毒两相宜的好地方It is.那可不I gotta go, I'm gonna be late for my other job in the city. 我得走了不然我打工要迟到了You have two jobs?你打两份工吗Yes, I babysit for a Manhattan socialite diva.对还给一个曼哈顿社交女王看孩子Now I have a set.现在又多了一个Sorry I'm late.抱歉来晚了Oh, thank God you're here,谢天谢地你终于来了there is a bridge and tunnel smell over by the babies宝宝身上有一股地下臭水沟的味儿that's stressing me out.快把我熏死了Their diapers probably need to be changed.应该是要换尿布了Again? I swear, the morning nanny just did that.又要换啊我肯定上午保姆才换了Motherhood is for reals.当妈可真不容易Max, remind me, what's my Twitter password?麦克斯我的推特密码是什么Twitter password."推特密码"Yes!对啦Hi, Brad. Hi, Angelina.嗨布莱德安洁莉娜Max, I need to tell you something because we're family.麦克斯你也是家人我有话想跟你说Now get me room temperature water and come over here. 先给我拿瓶常温的水We are victims of the Channing Ponzi scheme.我们是钱宁骗局的受害者Me, David, and Brangelina.我大卫还有布莱洁莉娜How much money did you lose?你们损失了多少Hold my hands.握紧我的手Nothing.分毫未损But it really scared me.不过吓死人家了Open that?帮我打开吧So do you know Caroline Channing?你认识卡洛琳·钱宁吗No, but she lost everything.不认识她什么都没有了She has no money.她一分钱都没有了Can you imagine having no money?你能想像没钱的滋味吗I mean, you wouldn't even have any money.我是指穷的连钱都没有了You should twit that.金句快发推特啊And no one will even talk to her.树倒猴孙散墙倒众人推I heard she went to six different friends' houses据说她为了找安身之地for a place to stay,去敲了六个朋友的家门and they all had to pretend they weren't home.可他们都假装不在家- That's not cool. - Yeah.-这太过分了-对啊- That's really sad. - So sad.-真是不幸-对啊Breaks my heart.听的都心碎了I guess motherhood has really opened me up emotionally. 当妈带孩子人都多愁善感了Max, I need to hold one of the babies,麦克斯我想抱抱我的宝宝bring me one.帮我抱个过来No, the other one. That's not the good one.我要另一个这个是次品- Hello. - Oh, hi.-你好-你好Oh, I'm so sorry if I woke you up.抱歉吵醒你了- Who are you? - I'm Max's friend.-你是谁啊-麦克斯的朋友Uh, don't tell her I said that.这话你可别跟她说I have a feeling if she heard me call her my friend, 她要知道我自称是她的朋友she'd stab me.她会冲过来杀我What are you doin' over there?你在这干嘛呢Just washing my uniform,洗我的制服trying to make it a little more cute让它变美美and a little less crusty.洗去那层污垢Oh, watch out!小心Oh! Sorry, oh, my...抱歉我的错Do you have a towel or a rag?你有毛巾或抹布-Or something? - No, I... I got it.-之类的吗-没关系我来搞定Oh, okay.好吧I'm Robbie.在下罗比I'm uncomfortable.在下不舒服You're getting me wet.你害人家都湿了That's the point.正有此意You're Max's boyfriend.你是麦克斯的男友It's cool.没关系的No, it's not.不有关系Back up, Jersey shore.走开卖肉男You're pathetic,你真可悲and that's coming from someone who's homeless而且还是被一个无家可归and wearing white after a labor day.无衣可换的人说And I've seen better.姐见过身材更好的No, you haven't.才怪你骗人Hey. Why didn't you wait for me?你怎么没等我I thought we were coming over together.不是说好一起过来的吗Oh. Um, I wanted to get here early to marry the ketchups. 我想早点来把番茄酱"联姻"起Listen, I heard something really upsetting about you today. 今天我听说了你的惨况What did he say, that I came on to him?他怎么说的说我投怀送抱吗Him who?"他"是指...Nothing.没啥Him, Robbie?你是说罗比对吧It's none of my business,这事不我无关but you deserve better than that guy.但我觉得那家伙跟你配不上Yeah, it is none of your business.对这事的确不你无关Ooh, I was just starting to feel sorry for you.唉我刚刚对你起了一丝怜悯之情I'm just saying, you're worth more than that.我是说你可以找个更好的What, I'm supposed to believe you about this?是吗我该相信你的话吗The person who lied on their resume,你连简历都作假and lied about the cupcakes... you're a liar.还用蛋糕赚差价你就是个大骗子- I'm just trying to help. - You know what?-我是想帮你啊-那好吧Since you seem to know so much about everything,既然你什么都懂why don't you take your wharton degree,干嘛不带着你的沃顿学位and your ridiculous coat, and figure this all out yourself.跟可笑的外套找一个能收留你的地方- Max.Max, wait. - Oh, look,-麦克斯等等-瞧The Arcade Fire concert just let out across the street,对街的拱廊之火乐队演唱会刚结束good luck with that.祝你好运She's coming back, right?她会回来的吧She's not gonna leave me here alone这满屋子的顾客with a restaurant full of people?她不会丢下我一个人的对吧Let me put it to you this way.我就这么跟你说吧You might as well be a night maid你就跟晚上在施瓦辛格家at the Schwarzenegger house.落单的女佣一样You got screwed.要被狠操一顿了- Oh. - Oh, yeah.-爽-太爽了That feels so good.爽死我了Now put your tambourine around it.把铃鼓换来这个位置Hi, honey, I'm home.亲爱的我回来了I want you gone by the time I get back.在我下班前滚蛋Babe! Babe, I can explain.宝贝宝贝听我解释You weren't supposed to be home.你回家太早了嘛People say I deserve better than you.人家说你配不上我Who? That blonde girl?谁那个金发妞吗She doesn't know what she's talkin' about.她懂个屁就会瞎说She went to Wharton人家是沃顿毕业的and Switzerland.还去过瑞士呢Yo, yo. Look at that.快看快看That girl is workin' harder than Stephen Hawking那妞儿干起活来比史蒂芬·霍金史蒂芬·霍金有肌肉萎缩症全身只有几根手指能动tryin' to put in a pair of cufflinks.扣袖口还努力呢Here, let me help you with that.来我来帮你I don't need any help.我不要人帮Everyone needs help sometimes.每个人都有需要帮忙的时候This isn't what I ordered.你们上错菜了This is Caroline.她叫卡洛琳She may have gotten your order wrong,她可能会下错单but she does get some things right.但她起码有些事情没做错Thank you.谢谢No, thank you.不是我要谢谢你What'd you see in that guy, anyway?你到底看上那家伙哪点He had these muscle thingies.他这里的肌肉不错- Oh,those things? - Yeah.-那里呀-是啊I don't know what those are called,我不知道那里怎么叫but they make smart girls stupid.但是好女孩看了就会意乱情迷Max!麦克斯I thought your tight ass wasn't coming in tonight,还以为今晚见不到你的小翘臀呢and my heart broke in half.我的心都快碎了You know what, Oleg?奥列格I needed that.这话我爱听So I...如果I need a roommate, if you wanna crash.你要找地方住的话咱俩可以当室友Not gonna lie, the subway's cleaner than your couch. 真不是我说地铁都比你家干净I just felt myself starting to like you.我好像对你有些好感了Really? Because I really feel like we could...真的吗我真觉得我们可...I knew that wouldn't last.我就知道纯属错觉Come on.走吧Tomorrow we can go into the city明天我们去市里and get the rest of your stuff.把你剩下的东西搬回来Everything's locked up.全部都锁起来了What, you have nothing that you care about that we can get? 没有一样你喜欢的东西是可以拿回来的吗Well, there is one thing.好像还真有一样The weirdest thing is that nobody stopped us.居然没人拦我们真是奇了怪了I'm gonna save a fortune,把它养在这里keeping him here instead of in the stables.比养在马厩里省钱多了When did you put this whole horse-in-my-yard thing together? 什么时候想到这养马大计的I can't help it.这就是我I see an opportunity, and I make it happen,只要有机可乘我绝不让它溜走like with your cupcakes.比如你的纸杯蛋糕Like what with my cupcakes?关我的小蛋糕啥事Ready? To open a bake shop,听好了开一家蛋糕店all we need is 250 grand start-up money,只需要二十五万启动资金来for the real estate, and the basic equipment...租店面和买一些基本设备Yeah. Oh.是嘛- 250 grand,that's all? - Yeah.-二十五万就够了吗-对Did freakin' Chestnut here kick you in the head我去星巴克的时候while I was in Starbucks?你的脑子让栗宝给踢了吗Hear me out.听我说完If we both worked two jobs要是我们两人同时打两份工and made $2,000 a week,一周进账两千块we could open a cupcake business in a little over a year. 我们就可以在一年后开蛋糕店了In the past two days, we've made $387,过去两天我们赚了三百八十七块and that's a good start.这是个不错的开始We can make extra money at other jobs,我们还能兼职别的工作赚外快呀like publicists, advertising executives...比如做公关广告行政janitors, drug mules.看门运毒We really need to work on your self-esteem.看来得先提升你的自尊So...所以说You, cupcakes, me, business background,你的美味小蛋糕加上我的商科背景us, success. What do you think?我们就等于成功怎样I think you have a horse.你还有匹马I think we have a horse.是我们有匹马Don't get attached.不要爱上我。