英语搞笑话剧《梁祝歪传》（搞笑中学生英语小品剧本）人物：梁山伯祝英台马文才英母英父第一场景：祝英台依依不舍梁山伯挥泪惜别背景音乐上海滩梁山伯上场梁：Where is my Yingtai(此时，背景音乐少女时代的Gee 祝英台上场彰显笑点英台请注意表演) 梁: Yingtai ，I love you so much and I’ll miss you so much.祝: I love you, too! Don’t worry.BoBo, I on ly love you in this world. I’ll marry you as soon as I’m back. Wait for me just for two years.梁: I’ll kiss you across the Pacific Ocean.祝: I’ll kiss you from the other side. Wait for me. BoBo, this time I really should be going.(依依不舍背景音乐响起不见不散两人分别逐步后退)第二场景：英母喜爱马文才英父痛批贪婪心英母：darling darling。

（拉住英父）英父：( 怒气转身) No matter what you Say, it is useless. The child's wedding could not be so hasty.英母：but darling ,Mawencai was so cool and so rich, There is no doubt that this is matched for marriage. An d……..(被英父打断)英父：I told you many times, we could not decide yingtai’s wedding.英母：darling….The Furthest Distance in The World Is not between life and death .But when I stand in front of you, yet you do not know he is so handsome. The furthest distance in the world is not between poor and rich, but when he stands in front of you, yet you can not see his love to yingtai.英父：Oh, honey, you are so knowledgeable, 哼哼，give me a kiss，give me a kiss.英母：嘘……..look, too many people…作害羞状英父：easy…拿雨伞挡住然后Kissing第三场景：马文才志疏学浅舍重金英父母笑纳彩礼嫁爱女（马文才上，拿折扇）马：I love yingtai so much. I hope I can make it.马：aunt……(注意回音效果)英母：文才……(注意回音效果) 马：哎……英母：oh，That was you，come in ，sit down please!马：aunt, I love yingtai so much，you know . here are my gifts，100 bottles of 国窖1573 .马：喝了1573，腿也不疼了，腰也不酸了，一口气能上三楼了，一瓶顶过去五瓶马: 他好，我也好（整个广告过程面向观众，突出效果）母：What else?马：three Benz and a big house in the seaside and so on .I hope you will like them!母：there is no doubt that yingtai must be yours , you are so handsome.父：NO way ! (大怒指着马) 马：that’s why?英父：I will ask you some questions ,listen ….马：OK英父：Do you know who is张国荣, who is张曼玉,马：I don’t know.英父：do you know who is 科比布莱恩特, who is姚明马：I don’t know.英父：Do you know 黄岩岛and 钓鱼岛belong to China马：I don’t know.英父：Do you see yourself? you look like a pig who know nothing? （转向英母）You ask me to Take yingtai to marry him how I can trust him ?英母：I have no words.马：but aunt have accepted my 3 million dollars and gifts.父：money ？You think money can buy everything?True love is priceless！Only 3 m illion dollar…. only 3 million dollar…. only 3 million dollar…. （逐渐反应过味来）OK OK You give me 3 million dollar and yingtai belongs to you 把女儿拉过来，推给马文才（注意背景音乐陶喆今天你要嫁给我）马：Oh,娘子……第四场景：祝英台越洋提分手梁山伯闻此怒结怨电话铃声响梁: Oh, honey, I miss you so much, miss you every minute every second. Oh my dear. Are you listening to me?祝: Listen, Liang Shanbo. I’m calling to tell you that I loved you. But I think you’d better find a better girl.梁: What? Pardon?祝: Because I’ll get married. My parents had taken me to marry Ma Wencai He is so handsome, just like 刘德华. So rich, even richer than比尔盖茨. And he is good at 葵花宝典。

I love his money and I love his body.(此时马文才注意表演)梁: What are you talking about? You wait and see. I’ll give you some color see see（给你点颜色看看）.祝：shanbo, If life deceives(欺骗) you, don't be sad, don't be impatient! believe me. everything will pass,and all these things will become a kind of memory.梁：FUCK you, the sun of beach(脏话). I’ll kill you! I will kill you in America!祝: America? Shit (脏话), You can come to America? Hahahaha大笑your English is so terrible第五场景：马文才一副空皮囊梁山伯抱得美人归（梁山伯飞往美国）旁： a year later,liangshanbo found zhuyingtai in American梁: Zhu Yingtai, long time no see, do you still know that who I am. I’m here to kill you.祝: Liangshanbo. Oh, Wencai. He is crazy. He will kill me.祝英台拉着马文才马: You! Get out of here.梁: You! Get out of here! 背景音乐儿歌找朋友梁马二人表演有待商量马：流氓会武术，谁也挡不住梁：流氓没文化马：我可是有大学本科学历的………流氓……梁：这年头没有博士文凭也敢出来耍流氓（梁扔掉扇子，拿出枪）马：Oh,wait please,(接电话) Hello ,I am Wencai , OK ,OK , I will get there now祝: Please don’t go. Just stay, please. He’ll kill me.马: I know! But if I stay, he’ll kill me by the way..祝: You told me you were good at 葵花宝典马: Sorry, I’m not good at 葵花宝典. I’m just good at 新华字典梁：想走…..It is not so easy（开枪）马文才搞笑吐血祝: Oh, you are a big liar. Just get out of here!! (to Liang Shanbo) Oh, darling, will you kill me? 动作声音妩媚些妩媚些眨眼睛梁: Yes, I have to. Because I hate you more than I can say.祝: When we were young, you said you will love me for ever. Don’t kill me, ok? BOBO.梁: No wa y! Wherever you go, whatever you say, I’ll kill you. I only know I was born to love you or to kill you. Now I can’t love you, the only choice is to kill you.祝: Please believe in me, you know I love you. I love you just like老鼠爱大米. I want to marry you.梁: Really?祝: Oh, of course.梁：Once upon a time, there was a true love in front of me, I didn’t cherish it. If I was to meet her again, I wish to say I love you. If you would ask me how long I would love her, I would say ten thousand years!如果，非要在这份爱上加一个期限，我希望是……一万年！祝：Oh, honey… 此时两人相拥配合音乐背景音乐响起爱你一万年全剧终4人英文小品剧本《新梁祝外传》（梁祝超级搞笑校园小品剧本）声明：本剧本由网络收集整理，版权归原作者所有！L:梁山伯Z:祝英台M:马文才旁：旁白旁：话说梁山伯和祝英台三年前一同来到刚刚成立的武汉新东方书院学习英语。