这六种美国留学个人陈述的开头千万不要
写

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本文 这六种美国留学个人陈述的开头千万不要写，仅供参考，
如果能帮助到您，欢迎点评和分享。
申请美国大学的申请人越来越多，申请竞争越来越激烈，写好个
人陈述将会为你加分不少。跟着来看看这六种美国留学个人陈述的开
头千万不要写。
一、重复简历型
I earned my Bachelor of Science degree in … Sciences with
a specialization in … in 2002 at … university
点评：美国留学个人陈述不要去重复简历中的东西，这在很多学
校的PS要求中明确提到，个人陈述的写作要具体到事件上，事件解
决上，而不要单纯重复已有的内容。
二、学校介绍型
I am an undergraduate in…University , the largest
university anda cradle of scientific and technological talents in
China.
点评：该同学的个人陈述开头等于是一个申请学校的简介，这好
像是在帮助学校做宣传，或表达你有多了解该学校，而不是写个人陈
述了。这是没有意义的开头，白白浪费了字数，最容易被秒据掉。
三、抄袭句式型
As a student majoring in Computer Science, I began my
odyssey since I entered undergraduate program. Indeed,
having entered this splendid computer world, I am more than
greedy for something new.
点评：Odyssey 和more than greedy for something new 这
种句式不知道是从哪里学到的，很多同学在用。但你要知道，老外最
恨抄袭，最喜原创，所以利害关系大家想想吧。
四、救世主型
I am a problem solver. I have an impulse as a kind of
instincts to solvevarious problems before me and enjoy doing
that. Since I was a little boy, a voice from President Franklin
Roosevelt has constantly hovered around my mind, "The world
can be changed by man's endeavor, …
点评：一副救世主的形象，小时候就受富兰克林的影响，立志改
变世界。个人陈述的写作一定要个人化具体化，别吹大牛，甚至带着
一种霸权主义思维。
五、犹抱琵琶型
Making a right decision at the right time is very important
for a young people .At present, I have come to a critical point
in my life when I have to make a decision concerning my
future course of action. Only a perceptive understanding of
oneself will enable one to chart his proper action.
Aftercarefully thinking, reviewing my life and analyzing my
personality, I make the determination and choose to apply for
graduate study in XXX. And I choose to specialize in
communications which I will pursue a lifelong career.
点评：重点放在自己要做重大决定上了，人生的转折点，然后来
上句所谓名言警句。浪费字数，有限的字数里，同学们应该学会直接，
并且抓住重点，突出自己最有优势的方面，最有特色的方面。
六、语言幼稚型
Why the gecko can climb on the wall while we can't-' 'Why
the leaves turn red in autumn' 'How many stars are there in the
sky-' When I was in childhood, I always kept asking my mom
all kinds of questions。I am especially interested in how things
work, I can even take apart things for several hours in order to
find out its principle.
点评：上来就回忆童年少年自己如何有着远大抱负，who cares。
个人陈述字数有限，却用这么多话描述童年，没有任何意义。学校想
知道你如何看待未来，而不是如何度过过去。