人类六项基本需求(2008-11-28 17:05:48)转载分类：激发潜能标签：杂谈1、certainty /comfort 确定的事带来舒适2、uncertainty/variety 不确定的事带来变化3、significance 重要,意义4、connection/love 人际,关系,亲人/爱5、growth 成长6、contribution 贡献每个人都有不同的梦想，但是基本需求都相同。
有的人达到自订的目标之后，不禁又问：我要的只有这些吗？这是因为他们从未真正了解自己所需，也不知道如何达到理想，只一味盲目地追求环境塑造出来的目标，了解六项基本需求，不但可激发自己的潜力，更加了解自己的实力，也能督促自己不断地向前努力迈进。
接下来我们将探讨推动您向前迈进的六项基本需求，但是首先必须了解自己的需求是什么，我们发展出“方法”或计划对策，有的将会大幅影响我们的生活，有的则是满足短暂的需求，过一阵子便失去作用。
例如，为了突显自己的特点，有的人设法击败别人，有的人收集所有的玩具，有的则是付出独特有意义的贡献。
选择的方法可解决当前甚至是长远未来的所需，同时也影响您未来是否获得成长或付出贡献，测定的方法是，回想过去生活中的经验，并将其分为四类，以下是四种类型的详细说明。
第一类经验是：感觉舒适对自己有利对他人有利有非常大的益处如果经验中有这几项标准，通常称为“最佳人生经验”第二类经验是：感觉不安但对自己有利对他人有利有非常大的益处这些通常是我们不想要的经验，但因为属于正常人的行为，往往也会为我们带来快乐，如果能够掌握，感觉则相当充实。
感觉踏实的秘诀是，试着将第二类经验转换成第一类，例如，学习如何调适自己的情绪，接受感觉不安但对自己、对他人都有利、有益的事情，试着让自己快乐的面对处理过程。
本课程中教导您使用的工具，便能协助您调适自己，了解其中的价值，当您知道如何接受有助于自己和其他人自觉生活的事情，必能拥有少数人可获得的骄傲，鼓励和自信心。
第三类经验是：感觉舒适对自己有害对他人有害没有任何益处这些是生活中常常的无建设性的，例如饮酒过量，便属于这一类。
第三类经验虽可立刻为您带来快乐，但时间久了，将会破坏生活品质，带来莫大的痛苦。
第四类经验是：感觉不安对自己有害对他人有害没有任何益处为什么有人依然沉溺于第四类经验中？例如，第一次吸烟，感觉必定不是很好。
但是沉溺第四类经验的人，只是因为来自他人影响的压力，或是为了适应环境和旧有的观念。
必须强迫自己忘却第四项经验，才可充分发挥自己的潜能。
必须恒久履行的六项人类需求为：确定性/心安、不确定性/变化、重要性、连接/爱、成长、贡献。
因为人类具备同样的六项需求，大家都有同样的问题，此外，这些需求彼此间相互矛盾，相互冲突。
如果选择错误的方式，满足这些需求，将会产生严重的问题，但是我们可以建立新的执行模式，迅速地主宰自己的生活。
所有的人类都必须感觉：1、确定性/心安对大多数人来说，感觉确定性即是充满希望，我们都需要确定性，远离痛苦增加快乐。
有些人为了获得确定性，便设法控制周围的事物，此类行为属于第三类经验，例如，短时间内感觉舒适，但对自己并不利，也对身旁的他人不利，更没有任何益处。
另一方面，藉由内心的勇气和信念取得确定性，便属于第一类方法。
有勇气坚守信念，感觉舒适，对自己有利，心中充满勇气和坚定的信念，让自己更努力做有益的事。
但此说法仍有自相矛盾的论点，当一个人心理感觉踏实，对事情有把握，满足了一己的需求之后，很可能觉得无聊。
需要确定性的同时，我们也需要……2、不确定性/变化每个人都喜欢多样化、惊喜、充满活力的挑战性，以及体验满足的感觉。
感觉过于踏实，便觉得无趣，同样地，过于多样化，又会觉得恐惧没有安全感。
生活中需要某些程度的踏实感，协调多样化的感受，我们必须在二项需求之间寻找平衡点，才能感到满足，有些人选择多样化，像是藉着药物或酒精，有些人选择看电影，有人则从刺激性的对话和生活中的机会不断学习，让心灵与感觉不断产生变化。
3、重要性每个人都希望自己具有重要性，希望在某方面有特殊的能力，生活有特殊的目标或意义。
可藉由消极的方式――认定自己独特的个性，达到这项需求。
例如，想像自己比其他人都优秀。
有的人可能故意制造问题，创造自己的独特性，医学界也显示，有的人刻意加重自己的病情，引起他人的关怀或注意，这些情况都属于第四项经验。
为了显示自己的重要性，每个人的表示方法都不同，有些人努力赚更多的钱，有些人收集多玩具，进修念书取得更高的学位，或是穿着特殊，独具风格，甚至我们也可以让生活更有意义，虽然这些项目有时也有点类似第二类经验，但仍应属于第一类。
请记得，每个人都应认为自己具有独特的价值，但矛盾的是，如果要显著自己特点，有时必须特立独行。
如果觉得自己很独特，同样也会觉得自己与他人不大一样，甚至孤立，便违反下列需求……4、连结与爱包括自己与彼此相互关怀的其他人，彼此之间的连结。
若要满足这项需求，您可加入建设性目标的群组或团体。
加入帮派将有负面的影响，但是他们彼此之间仍维持密切的连结，追随上帝，时时刻刻获得它的指引，也是一种密切的连结。
如上述，有些人刻意加重病情，为了和他人联络的关系。
其他人努力地提高原来的地位，希望获得高阶层人士的接纳关爱。
请记得一项简单的道理，所有人的需求都相似，如果持续地付出自己希望得到的同等对待，他人必定会以同样的回应对待自己。
5、成长成长就是生活，地球上所有的物质，不是处生存状态便是死亡状态，成长是生活中二项主要需求之一，与拥有的金钱多寡，有多少结识的朋友，甚至一生的成就均无关。
除非觉得自己不断成长，否则人生必定痛苦无趣，此外，您必须同时体验快乐、有意义的……6、贡献人人都应超越自我，过着有意义的人生，您将体验真正的喜悦和成就感。
人们无法付出本身没有的事物，不单是受惠他人，同时也受惠自己的贡献，绝对是有意义的行为，受惠自己和受惠他人，特别是无私的奉献，将为您带来一生难能可贵的喜悦。
如果您认为有趣的行为，对其他人来说是麻烦事（您却可以不停地做数小时）相信您必定认为其中具备踏实、多样化、重要性或独特性、关系、成长和贡献的感受。
当我们察觉出某项行为合乎自己的需求，必定会实际付诸行动，同样地，自己一向逃避或拖延的某些事情，必定是因为现阶段过去的经验，让您备感没有把握，缺乏乐趣（也许已经确定将是种痛苦的经验）认为并不符合自己的需求。
只要稍微改变观念（注意、体会或信仰）或策略（如何达到目的的方法），人类所有的行为均将符合这六项需求。
如果得知符合六项需求的方法，您会发现自己充满干劲，明确地知道如何达成目标，从全新的体认开始――明确了解自己的目标和理想，找到全新的努力方向。
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------你的作业1、哪些是您个人喜欢做的事？哪些让您觉得有被迫行事的感觉？哪些事情是容易且能实现个人抱负的？或是可连续做24小时都不感厌烦的事？请写在下方空格处，填妥人类需求分析表1之后，可得知各项感受的原因。
2、哪些是您个人厌恶做的事？哪些事是非不得已必须做的事？是否有任何事情，因为个人厌恶之故，而从未完成？请写在下方空格处，填妥人类需求分析图表2之后，便可得知各项感受的原因。
3、想出个人不喜欢做，或让自己感觉不舒服的事情，但是实际上却对自己或他人有利，且有非常大的益处。
藉着问自己问题，将第二类经验转换为第一类。
该怎么做最可能符合六项人类需求？想出答案时，将其写在日记中，并且立刻尝试做做看！The Six Human Needs(2008-11-28 17:09:30)转载分类：ENG标签：杂谈1. Certainty/ComfortFor most people, certainty equals survival. We all need a sense ofcertainty that we can avoid pain and gain pleasure. Some people try toachieve certainty by trying to control everything around them. This isusually a Class 3 experience; i.e., it may feel good for the moment butit’s not good for them, it’s not good for those around them, and itdoesn’t serve the greater good. On the other hand, using your internalcourage or faith to achieve certainty would be a Class 1 vehicle. Whenyou’re feeling courageous, when you’re really using your faith, youfeel good, what you’re doing is good for you, and in a cour ageous andfaith-filled state you tend also to do those things that serve the greatergood.Here’s the paradox, though. When a person becomes totally certain,when things are completely predictable, when you satiate this need, youbecome b-o-r-e-d. And so while we want certainty, we simultaneouslywant a certain amount of.2. Uncertainty/VarietyEveryone needs variety, a surprise, a challenge to feel fully alive and toexperience fulfillment. With too much certainty, we’re bored.Likewise, with too much variety, we become extremely fearful andconcerned. We need a degree of certainty in our lives to appreciate thevariety. There’s a delicate balance between these two needs that mustbe struck for us to feel truly fulfilled. Some people choose to getvariety, to feel a change in their states or the way they feel, by doingdrugs or alcohol. Some people do it by watching movies. Others usestimulating conversation and opportunities to learn.3. SignificanceWe all have a need for significance, a sense that we am unique in someway, that we have a special purpose or meaning for our lives. Again,we can try to meet this need through destructive vehicles—makingourselves unique by, for example, m anufacturing a belief that we’rebetter than everyone else. Some people become unique by developing extreme problems that set them apart from others. Medical science now shows that some people have developed the subconscious ability tomake themselves ill in order to gain the caring attention of others. This would clearly be a Class 4 experience. Some people developuniqueness by earning more money, having more toys, going to schooland achieving more degrees. Or by dressing in a unique way, having a certain sense of style. Or we can choose to live a life of extraordinary service. This is clearly a Class 1 experience, although it may feel likeClass 2 at times.Just remember, we all need to feel unique. But, paradoxically, in orderto feel unique we have to separate ourselves. If we feel totally unique,we feel different and separate, and this violates our need for…4. Connection and LoveThis includes feeling connected with yourself as well as others withwhom you can share your love. To meet this need, you can join a groupor a club that has a positive purpose. Some individuals join a gang for negative purposes but they still achieve the feeling of connection. By aligning with your Creator, and feeling like you’re being guided, youcan feel immediate connection. Again, sometimes individuals becomeill in order to feel connected and loved. Some people will steal, dodrugs, drink excessive amounts of alcohol, to be part of a group and tofeel a sense of connection. Others will perform at extraordinary levelsin order to be accepted, loved, or connected to a high performanceteam. A simple thing to remember is, as with all other human needs, ifyou give consistently that which you wish to receive, you tend to get itback from others.5. GrowthGrowth equals life. On this planet, everything that is alive is eithergrowing or dying. Growth is one of the two primary needs in life. It doesn’t matter how much money you have, how many people acknowledge you, what you’ve achieved in life. Unless you feel likeyou’re grow ing, you will be unhappy and unfulfilled. But in addition,you must also experience the euphoria of meaningful...6. ContributionWe all have a deep need to go beyond ourselves and to livea life that serves the greater good. It is in the moments that we do thisthat we experience true joy and fulfillment. Contributions are not onlymade to others but contributing to ourselves is a meaningful action aswell, for we cannot give to others that which we do not have. A balanceof contribution to oneself and to others, especially unselfish contribution, is the ultimate secret to the joy that so many people wishto have in their lives.If there’s anything you do that others find difficult but that you love to do (andthat you could do for hours), I can promise you it’s because you get a tremendous amount of certainty, variety, significance or uniqueness, connection, growth and/or contribution from this. When we perceive that an action will meet many of our needs, we are driven to take that action. Likewise, if ther e’s something you avoid doing or are constantly putting off, it’s because your current strategy of approaching it causes you to feel a lack of certainty that it will have pleasure (maybe you actually have a sense of certainty that it will be painful) or yo u don’t believe it meets many of your other needs.Anything human beings do can meet all six needs if they simply change their perception (what they notice, appreciate, or believe) or their strategy (how they approach getting the job done).If you’ll find just a few vehicles to meet all six of your needs, you’ll find yourself full of drive and you’ll know what to do to achieve your goals. And it all starts with awareness—you must become aware of why you’re doing what you’re doing now so that you can find a new pattern for fulfillment!。