【标题】中西方婚俗文化差异【作者】【关键词】【指导老师】【专业】英语【正文】I. IntroductionMarriage is the basic system and form that both sexes combine in society. The marriage culture is produced with the development of marriage, which reflects a certain marriage conception. Marriage custom not only incarnates the social appearance in some times, but also shows values, ways of thinking, and religious beliefs of one nation.1In ancient China, people thought highly of marriage culture. Ancient people regarded marriage as the primary and incipience of all decorum. Chinese long history and abundance culture have penetrated into marriage culture, so it is the cohesion of Chinese culture. While because of geography, nationality, history, religious beliefs and other aspects, the marriage culture in western countries is different from Chinese. Therefore, this paper has discussed the differences of marriage culture among Chinese, British and American. Firstly, it has introduced some similarities of marriage culture between China and Western Countries. Secondly, it has described ancient and modern Chinese marriage culture, the British and American marriage culture. Besides, it has introduced some main differences, such as the wedding process, the wedding dress, the wedding car and other details. Finally, it analyzed the causes of differences, including religious beliefs, the ways of thinking.II. Similarities of Marriage Culture between China and Western Countries Every country has her nationality, but they have some similarities. No matter in China or Western Countries, marriage is a great turning point in life. Both of people all pay great attention on it, and they always choose a nice day, which is sunny and propitious time, so wedding date is very important in every country. In ancient China, people would like to choose an auspicious day based on lunar calendar, which meant the couple would love each other and live a good life in the future. Similarly, the foreigners also choose a perfect day to hold wedding. For example, in England men hate to hold wedding in May. Because May has been considered an unlucky month to marry in. In addition, Fridays were considered unlucky particularly Friday the 13th. There has a famous old rhyme advises a wedding of the week. “Monday for wealth, Tuesda y for health, Wednesday the best day of all, Thursday for losses, Friday for crosses, Saturday for no luck at all.2At present, western cultures have made great influences on Chinese wedding, so they also have some similarities. We can see that many young people would like to hold their weddings in church. Moreover, in wedding, the bride wears wedding veil, the groom dresses suit and necktie, their relatives and friends are all sit there to make bless for them. After the wedding, the bride will stand back the other people and then throw a red ball to the unmarried female. As the story says, no matter who got the ball, she would be married soon or later. So all the unmarried females stand together and try their best to gain it. Besides, many newlyweds would like to take their honeymoon, a one-to-two week vacation trip, to celebrate their new marriage. III. Differences of Marriage Culture between China and Western CountriesA. Marriage Culture of China1. Traditional Marriage CultureIn ancient China, the model of traditional marriage culture including six etiquettes. The first step was proposing, which was very important in ancient China. Because it was the first time to meet with each other for the two families. If a male’s parents liked someone’s daughter and thought she had some qualities to become their daughter-in-law, they would appoint a matchmaker carried with some presents to the identified girl’s family. If the girl’s parents would like to agree this proposal, they would send someone who carried wit h some presents to the boy’s family in return. The second step was asking name. In ancient times, the girl’s name did not tell others until she chosen husband. In fact, it was not only to know the girl’s name, but also to write down the girl’s birthday and birth-hour on paper, which used to make a divination. In this step, matchmaker played an important role in communication. We knew in Chinese traditional marriage, people qualified a validity marriage for parents and matchmaker. In ancient, a boy wanted to make a proposal with a girl, and the girl also enjoyed him, but she refused his requirement. She said that she could not accept his mind because he not had matchmaker.3 Today we will be confused for her words. While in ancient times, without a matchmaker, their marriage would be immorality.The next step was birthday matching. After asking the name, male’s parents would appoint the matchmaker to ask for the girl’s birthday and birth hour to assure the compatibility of the potential bride and groom. The divination included two aspects: the first was asking women’s quality. In ancients’ view, a man always had several wives. In order to let them get well with each other, he always considered his wife’s quality as an important factor. The second was to see whether the girl could match up with her husband. If her birthday and birth hour did not conflict with her husband according to astrology, the marriage would step into the next stage.The fourth step was presenting betrothal gifts. After birthdays matching, the groom’s family arranged the matchmaker to present betrothal gifts, enclosing the betrothal letter to the bride’s family. This stage including two meanings: one side was to show their thanks for the girl’s parents, the other side was to purchase dowrie s for Bride. If the girl’s parents accepted the betrothal gifts, their marriage could be a deal, and could not be changed on their own opinion.The fifth step was picking a wedding date. When they chosen a good day, they would tell the girl’s family and g ive them time to prepare dowries. The ancients would like to choose the marriage time on spring or autumn. Because people thought spring was the beginning of a year and good for everything, and autumn was a harvest season, so they had enough money to hold a wedding. The last step was wedding ceremony, which was the most liveliness and best time of the traditional marriage culture. At that day, groom who wore hat and safflower departured with a troop of escorts and musicians, playing happy music all the way to meet his bride. However, before he met his bride, the bride’s relatives and good friends would settle some obstacles to groom until they satisfied with him. While at the same time, the bride put on new clothes in her room. Then, she got in sedan, and escorted by a group of people to her new home. After they reached the destination, the bride’s feet could not touch the threshold when entering her new home, so need her husband to carry her over it. When the groom’s parents and all the relatives gathered in the hall, the newlyweds began to do some obeisance, such as kowtows to the Heaven and Earth, the family ancestors and parents, bow to each other and so on. Under the applauses of the audience, the bride was taken to her chamber. This was the end of the wedding.2. Modern Marriage CultureNowadays, modern marriage culture has some innovations based on traditional marriage culture. To sum up, modern marriage culture has two characteristics: firstly modern marriage culture still depends on the past. Nowadays many young people enjoy to pursuit an original and unusual wedding, but it is easy to find some reflections of the traditional culture, especially in some countries and minorities. Secondly, western marriage culture influenced modern marriage culture. With the open and reform of China, more and more foreigners come to our country, expecting for increasing our economy, they also influence our traditional culture, religious beliefs and ways of thinking. Therefore, modern marriage culture consists of amativeness, engagement and marriage.The first is amativeness. We have learned that parents and matchmaker played important roles in traditional marriage culture. While for the two actors, they have no choice but to accept this engagement. However, at present,matchmaker is not important in marriage. Even many young people do not consider their parents’ feeling any longer, most times they would like to choose their companions by themselves. They always hope that their companions have the similar hobbies, characteristics and ambition with them. Besides, they hope they should have equal rights in their life. When they meet some difficult problems, they will tell each other at first and then discuss how to deal with them. Once they think that they have find perfect companions, they will clear away all troubles to live together. After they get along with each other several months or several years, they begin to discuss matrimony. This called engagement.In urban, the traditional engagement is weaker than before. The man’s parents carrying with some presents to call at woman’s home. During this meeting, both of them are familiar with each other and discuss the wedding date, the bridal chamber, and other necessary things. Once they reach an agreement, the man will b uy a golden ring for his fiancée. After the engagement, this thing can’t be cancelled at will. While in rural it is a significant event. First, the woman’s mother invites her relatives to call at the man’s home. If they satisfy with all things, they begin to discuss some details about the marriage. Besides, the man’s parents still prepare some precious gifts and a lot of money for their daughter-in-law to purchase dowries. In some undeveloped country, they can’t offer enough money for dowry, so many grown m en can’t get married. Even if in some wealthy countries, many marriages have to be cancelled because both of them can’t make an agreement on money. Therefore, money is to be an obstacle to a happy marriage in rural, which needs us to change it.4 Once the engagement come into force, the woman and her parents cannot go back their words. Otherwise, they are not only considered immorality, but also have to pay for the economic loss to the other side.At last, it is turn to hold wedding. In our country after getting a certificate, people can hold a wedding. On wedding day, the bride gets up early and dresses up herself in a beauty parlor, then stays at home to wait for her groom. At the same time, the groom and his relatives drive several decorated cars to meet bride. Similarly, before him meet his wife, the bride’s relatives and good friends will settle some obstacles to spite him until they satisfied with him. About twelve o’clock, the groom dresses up business suit and necktie and the bride wears bridal veil, standing in the front of the restaurant to receive their relatives and friends. When all the guests arrive there, the new couple goes to the dinner hall with Wedding March, which is the climax of the wedding. At this time, the guests can ask the newlywed to introduce their love affairs, and even their friends will do some hoaxes to make fun of them. Afterwards under the guidance of the elders, the newlywed will drink toasts to their guests one by one. This isthe end of the marriage.B. Marriage Culture of Western CountriesMany western countries have some similarities in marriage culture, but also have their own national characteristics. Now, I will take Britain and American for example.1. British Marriage CultureIn the past, parents or guardians arranged marriage. The bride and groom often were not acquainted until their marriage. The parents often made the marriage arrangements and betrothals while the bride and groom were small children. The children would continue to live with their own parents and meet from time to time for meals or holiday celebrations. However, because of the Civil Marriage Act, a qualified marriage always required parents’ agreement, publication of banns, a register, two or more witnesses, or issuance of a license.Today, British marriage culture has some changes based on the tradition. Young people can choose their girl friends or boy friends on their own wishes. When the men and women’s affection become stable, they will tell their parents and then publish the engagement on newspaper. The betrothal rites of England often hold at bride’s home. They arrange a wedding banquet, and invite their friends and relatives to take part. Under the celebrations of all the guests, the groom wears the ring on the bride’s left middle finger, which implies that she belongs to him. After the engagement, they begin to prepare the wedding. Generally, it holds in church, groom who wears formal dress standing in front of alter to wait for his bride. While the bride whose one-hand holds a rose, and the other hand hooks on her father’s arm and walks to her groom. Then minister reads out the meaning and purpose of Christianity marriage, and ask the bride and groom if they would like to marry with each other. When their answers have no doubt, the minister will give the bride’s right hand to the groom’s and speak out the marriage vows together. After this, groom puts the ring on his bride’s third finger of the left hand. Then, groom takes his bride out of the church, while their relatives throw rice, colorful pieces of paper to them.At the dinner, the new couple will use a knife to cut a big cake, and feed each of them a bit. Guests mingle while enjoying cake, punch and other treats. Later the bride throws her bouquet of flowers to a group of single girls. At the end of the dinner, the couple bid farewell to their friends and then take a honeymoon, one or two week’s vacation trip, to celebrate their marriage.2. American Marriage CultureIn American traditional wedding custom, a young man asks the father of hissweetheart for permission to marry her. If the father agrees, the man later proposes to the woman. The man usually gives his fiancée a diamond ring as a symbol of their engagement. After they engaged for weeks, months, or even years, they begin to prepare their wedding.Before two or three months of the wedding, the bride’s family will arrange a bridal shower. In that day, the bride’s relatives and friends give their special gifts to her, and then she open these gifts one by one to enjoy them. Usually, women will prepare cake to regal their both relatives. Besides, the groom and the bride will hold parties with their own friends to farewell their single life. Then the bride’s parents begin to prepare all things of the wedding, such as the bridal wedding veil, the invitation, the auditorium and so on.At last, it’s time for the wedding. At that day, the couple may invite hundreds of people or just a few close friends to join in their wedding in church. As the ceremony begins, the groom stands with the minister, facing the audience. Followed by Wedding Match, groomsmen and bridesmaids, maid of honor, ring bearer and flower girl, and then bride’s father take her daughter entering. When they reach the altar, the bride’s father put her daughter’s right hand into the groom’s left hand. Then, the bride and the groom face the minister to take vows.Firstly, minister announces to the audience: Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join these two people in holy matrimony, if any one can show just cause why they may not be lawfully joined together, let them speak now or forever hold their peace. If there is anyone who feels that this ceremony should not continue, please speak now. For several minutes, if there is no one to oppose, he then addresses the newlywed and asks: do you take this man or woman to be your lawfully wedded husband or wife, to live together after god’s ordinance, in the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love, honor, comfort, and cherish her from this day forward, forsaking all others, keeping only unto her for as long as you both shall live. After the couple answering ‘I do’, they begins to make their marriage vows: I take thee to be my wedded wife or husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, honor, and cherish, until death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my troth.After taking the vows, the minister gets bride’s and groom’s rings from the best man and maid of honor, and then prays over their rings. Groom and bride exchange their rings. The minister joins their right hands together and pronounces that they are husband and wife. Later out of church, the bride throws her bouquet of flowers to a group of single girls. Tradition says that the one who catches the bouquet will be next to many. Then the newlywedsrun to their decorated car with a ‘Just Married’ and speed off to celebrate their new marriage.C. Main differences of Marriage Culture between China and Western Countries1. The Wedding ProcessIn ancient China, people considered marriage as a very important thing in life. Therefore, they divided marriage into six steps: Proposing, Asking Name, Birthday Matching, Presenting Betrothal Gifts, Picking a Wedding Date, Wedding Ceremony. This was a very complicated process. At the wedding day, the groom was crowed among his friends as escorts and musicians who played happy music all the way to bride’s home. About twelve o’clock, the bride and groom reached their new home, and went to the family altar, where the couple paid kowtows to Heaven and Earth, the family ancestors and parents successively. After bowing to each other, the bride went to the bridal chamber.The western-style wedding including ceremony and banquet two parts:At 17:00 o’clock, the ceremony start, the Priest arrives; broadcast approach music, the best man and bridesmaid enter the church, nearby weight stand and face the guests. The ring child gives the wedding ring to the Priest. At 17:03, along with the wedding ceremony matching song, the bride pulls her father and enters the church. Then bride’s father personally puts his daughter’s hand to the groom’s hand. At 17:10, music stop and entire audience are silent. The bride and the groom exchange the rings and take on oath. At 17:15, Chief wedding witness gives a speech. At 17:20, the ceremony finish. The newlywed leave the stage after music resounds, the guest applauds the celebration and strews the flower petal to the newlywed. At 17:30, the newlywed and the guests photograph accepts as a memento. At 17:40, the orchestra plays music, the guests enter the dinning room, may enjoy themselves to dine the savory and drink. At 18:10, after the newlywed enters the dinning room, first food starts to provide, and the waiter pours out the champagne to the visitor. The important guest gives a speech. At 18:40, after the savory, the newlywed jump the bridal waltz. The best man, bridesmaid and other guests enter the dance floor afterwards to dance together. At 19:00, all the people takes a seat again and waiting for the staple food. At 19:30, while provide the sweet snake, the dance party continued. At 20:00, the bride throws the bouquet of flowers. At 20:10, the newlywed shuttle between the guests and thank for their presence, also provide the coffee and each kind of drinks. At 20:30, after the newlywed cut the cake together, the guests dance or leave the banquet freely.52. The Wedding DressIn ancient China, people like red color, so on their wedding day bride and groom are all putting on red clothes, which symbolize jubilation, lively,and happiness. Today, people like to hold wedding in church, but the bride’s wedding veil is borrowed from a certain wedding company. However, in western countries, people advocate purity and romantic, therefore, the brides always wear traditional white, and draw on a pair of white glove, and their wedding veils made by themselves. Especially, American brides always wear something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue. Something old is the wedding veil, or headgear, which inherits from the bride’s mother. Something new is the bride’s gifts, which come from her friends, such as skirt, accouterment and so on. Something borrowed is from anybody else. It said that the bride puts borrowed gold or silver in her shoes will bring her luck of wealth. Something blue is the bride’s blue accouterments or bouquets, which mean bride’s purity and chastity.63. The Wedding CarChinese people decorate their wedding cars with red flowers and balloon. Besides, they put a pair of moppets on the car, which symbolize the bride and the groom. While, foreigners decorate their wedding cars with tissue paper, cans or old shoes, and a "Just Married" sign. As said that the sounds made by the cans or old shoes can lustrate demon and bring good luck for the newlywed.74. Other DetailsFirstly, the groom’s family bears the expense of the marriage in China, while in western countries, the costs are totally took by the bride’s family. Secondly, Chinese wedding always needs one groom man and bride maid, while the foreigners need two or more groomsman and bridesmaid. In addition, the bride always goes back to her parents to live with them several days. However, in western countries after the wedding, the newlywed runs to take their honeymoon directly, to celebrate their new marriage. While best man and bridesmaid hold their wedding dinner.IV. Causes of differences in Chinese Marriage Culture and Western CountriesA. Religious BeliefsChina regards Buddhism as principle, and thinks the marriage is destined by heaven, so people have no ability to change it. Therefore, in traditional marriage culture, bowing to heaven and earth is an important part of wedding. Moreover, Chinese people apply red to add happy atmosphere in such big days. Therefore, at the wedding day, the bride’s clothes and shoes are red, even bridal’s chamber and their sedan chairs are decorated with red. Besides, people consider that a qualified marriage must need a matchmake r’s collection and parents’ agreement. While Christianity believesthat “marriage is joined together by god, let not man put asunder.”8 When they get married, they should gain the god’s agreement. Therefore, theyhold their wedding in church, where bride and groom read out vows to each other under the witness of the minister and their relatives. In addition, the bride must wear traditional white veil in western wedding. Since Roman times, white has symbolized happiness, and wealth. Even now, it stands for purity and romantic.B. Ways of ThinkingThe different marriage custom has a direct contraction with the ways of thinking. Chinese people are more conservative, and more old-fashioned. So several thousand years past, their marriage custom hasn’t changed a l ot until western cultures are introduced into their nation. In addition, Chinese people love jollification. For example, after wedding banquet, the friends of the new couple will go to their new room. They believe that the livelier in the bride’s chamber, the more happiness the new couple will get in their later life. So people take various methods to make difficulties for the newlywed. However, the western people are quite more open and they demand a little about their wedding. Their wedding always holds in church: the bride and groom entering the church followed with wedding match, the bride whose one-hand holds a rose, and the other hand hooks on her father’s arm and walk to the groom. Then the bride’s father put her right hand on the groom’s hand, which means he trust the groom and hope the groom can protect, love his daughter forever. At the same time, all the people will bless the new couple. In the front of the minister, the newlywed makes their marriage vows and exchanges their rings. After the minister saying that seal the promises you have made with each other with a kiss, the wedding ends. At last, bride and groom will take their honeymoon for one or two weeks. V. ConclusionThe marriage culture is produced with the development of marriage, which reflects a certain marriage conception. It does not only incarnate the social appearance in some times, but also shows values, ways of thinking, and religious beliefs of one nation. So it is very important to understand the differences of marriage culture in different countries. Firstly, I have introduced the similarities of marriage culture between China and Western Countries. For example, they all choose propitious day to hold their wedding. Besides, they have some other similarities in modern marriage culture. Then I have introduced differences among Chinese, British and American marriage culture, including the wedding process, the wedding dress, the wedding car, and other details. According to the comparison of marriage culture, we can understand their religious beliefs, ways of thinking, culture and so on.In a word, with the development of global economy, people from different countries communicate with each other frequently, so understanding their different culture is very important and significant in intercultural communication, and the thesis is just one part. The author believes the study of this field will go on and will acquire more achievements.。